Cher and Lady Gaga Collaborated on a Song, and It Is So Terrible

Lady Gaga has been so busy lately: dreaming up new and zany ways to sexualize Muslim women, yelling about bloggers, ruining performance art for everyone, and so on. A secret thing that the industrious Mother of Monsters did in her subterranean den (or wherever she dwells) was record a song with Cher — which she then nixed, probably because it is awful-sounding.

Here's the (prematurely leaked) track, which is titled "The Greatest Thing":

[UPDATE: the track has been removed from SoundCloud; it's still up here, though.]

"It sounds like a DDR version of an Old Navy commercial" was my first impression, so that's what I shall stand by. And I'm not the only person who feels displeased — Cher is quite unhappy about the leak and responded in a very typically Cher manner:

This whole debacle leaves me with one lingering question: why did Marina Abramovic invite Lady Gaga to wear a funny mask and dance in the creek when it is so clear that Cher is better suited for performance art?

Image via Getty.