Jezebel: Cavemen

Clan Of The Cave Bear Saga Ends With 6th Book

Dodai Stewart — Tue, 29 Mar 2011 17:20:00 EDT

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My class read Clan Of The Cave Bear in fifth grade. I'm not sure why — was it part of English? History? Sex ed? What I do know is that it was vivid, and steamy, and taught us a gesture that meant, "You, on your knees for fornication. Now." More »

Clan Of The Cave Pair

Anna Holmes — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 14:15:00 EST

[Warsaw, November 27. Image via Getty]

"There's A Man-Sized Feeling Of Power In Smoking A Cigar…"

Dodai Stewart — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 13:30:00 EST

How exactly does it "bring out the caveman"? Why is she the one in a Jungle Jane ensemble? And aren't the club and the cigar phallic symbols? So many questions. [Vintage Ads] More »

(Stone) Age Of Innocence: Cave Man Fantasies

Sadie Stein — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 12:20:00 EST

Screw vintage. The alleged new nostalgia is for "a much earlier epoch: the Pleistocene, when humans lived in small hunter-gatherer groups and didn’t worry about high cholesterol." More »

From reader PoliticalPartyGirl, recently...

Anna Holmes — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 18:30:00 EDT

From reader PoliticalPartyGirl, recently back from a European vacation: "So, I'm on vacay in Europe. I was in France visiting the caves at Lascaux where they discovered ancient cave paintings when I made a discovery of my own... Tounga the Caveman and his loyal Cave Bimbo! The Bimbo is so far ahead of her time, it appears she has discovered hair dye, Botox, collagen, and silicone! Also, revealing asymetrical necklines." (Click the pic to see a bigger version.) More »

Paul Janka, John Fitzgerald Page Try To Out-Douche Each Other On Dr. Phil

Tracie Egan Morrissey — Wed, 07 May 2008 19:00:00 EDT

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"Casanova Caveman" Paul Janka and "The Worst Person in the World" John Fitzgerald Page both appeared on Dr. Phil today for a show about men with huge egos. I, for one, would be shocked if either of these 'bags get laid anytime soon — if ever again — because they just let millions of women know just what giant tools they are. Here's the thing: It's not necessarily bad that Janka just wants to get laid, or that Page wants to date a "certain caliber" of women. It's the way they go about it that sucks. Dr. Phil caught Page — a man who complains about the lack of honesty women exhibit in online dating — in a lie about his age. And Janka's whole being is a huge front. The fact that he views sexual relationships as a game, in which he wins (which I guess makes the women he sleeps with the losers?), is insulting. Plus, he admits to eating Clif bars for "player power." Clip above, and after the jump, some priceless audience reaction shots. More »

Coming Up On Dr. Phil: Paul Janka, Caveman Casanova

Tracie Egan Morrissey — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 19:00:00 EDT

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Dr. Phil has been running commercials for all-new, jaw-dropping episodes coming up in May, and guess who is among the guests? Paul Janka. In a brief 30-second spot, we learn that, while in the Dr. Phil studio, he hit on the show's staff, and that he continues to embrace his inner Neanderthal. "I invoke the idea of a caveman. I take charge and the women like it," he says. Ha! What a douche! After the jump, check out the audience's reactions to his ridiculousness. More »

Caveman Confronts "View" Creationist Sherri Shepherd

Tracie Egan Morrissey — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 13:00:00 EDT