Bristol Palin Rumored To Be Considering Devilry

Sun Devilry, that is. The dancin’-est Palin reportedly purchased a home near Tempe, Arizona, fueling rumors that a college career could be in her future. Will Arizona State University, “the Harvard of date rape,” be ready for this jelly?

Bristol dropped a reported $172,000 in cash on a house near the university and has reportedly telling friends that she plans to attend school there. The school has yet to comment.

On one hand, it’s great that she’s trying to improve her future prospects and is using the money she’s earned from her “Don’t Do What Donna Don’t Did!” role as a spokesperson for teen abstinence PSAs (and, one could argue that her embarrassing stint on Dancing With The Stars was sort of an extended “some people should not dance because they look very silly when they do it” PSA) to attend college rather than, I don’t know, travel around the world by boat doing cocaine off of other D list celebrities. On the other hand, Bristol’s presence in Arizona can only mean that her mother will occasionally visit her there, and between Sheriff Joe Arpaio, Jan Brewer, and the angry shell that remains of John McCain, that state is already pretty stocked up on crazy jerks. Sarah Palin’s presence there could have catastrophic effects, offsetting the already unstable state and setting in motion a chain of events that cause the entire land mass to collapse upon itself into a kind of asshole black hole from which nothing can escape.

Bristol Palin’s College Decision— Signs Point To Arizona State University Sun Devils [TMZ]