In the old days, childless adults who wanted to get their Thin Mint on would have to seek out Girl Scout Cookies the ancient way: by approaching strange children on the street and asking them if they had any cookies, or by hanging out near elementary schools after the closing bell rang in hopes that one of the little girls would skip by in a green uniform. Unsurprisingly, this method of Girl Scout Cookie acquisition was problematic on multiple levels, and resulted in embarrassing misunderstandings with law enforcement and parents.
Fortunately, all of the old problems associated with getting your kid-free mitts on some health-free cookies — including what was done at my office, which involved someone frustratingly sending out an email that read something to the effect of DOES ANYONE KNOW ANY CHILDREN?!?! — are now relics of a bygone time.
Welcome to the age of the Girl Scout Cookie finding app.
Called The Girl Scout Cookie Locator, it's almost as though it was willed into existence by your own personal necessity. Here's the app's description:
The free Cookie Locator lets you find cookies on sale close to you. Use your phone's GPS location to find cookies nearby, or find cookies by ZIP code, city, or state. You can map your way to a cookie booth or share results with friends. Add the sale details automatically to your calendar so you remember to stop by and stock up on your favorites. Girl Scout Cookie® Sales happen in the fall and in the spring, depending on your area. A fun countdown clock tells you when the sales start for you.
The Girl Scout Cookie Locator isn't perfect — it's only available on iTunes, it only finds public sales registered with the app, and it doesn't cause boxes of cookies to be flown to your house via owl messenger. But it's not nothing!
So let this be the first Girl Scout Cookie season that you support a good cause and fill your cookie-bereft stomach without creepily obsessing about the age and gender of other people's kids. It will save your roommate the bail.