Huzzah! We have now entered the wild speculation phase of the celebrity conscious uncoupling jamboree! Chris Martin was spotted (actually, let's go with CAUGHT!!!) getting a "late-night milkshake" with model Alexa Chung at Glastonbury, um, last June. The pair was reportedly "chilling and having a good time."
Noted milkshake hut employee Jessica Goldsack weighed in:
The 37-year-old musician enjoyed a late-night milkshake with Alexa, 30, at Glastonbury music festival in the UK last June, with Jessica Goldsack, who served the pair, today telling MailOnline: 'They turned up together at around 3 or 4am and came over to where I was working at Shaken Udder and said to me and my friend 'what do you recommend?'
'They looked like they were just chilling and having a good time. I did find it a little odd that they were together - but we had a little chat and they wandered off after they asked us if we knew of any good places to go and have a few drinks.'
Again. LAST FUCKING JUNE. Other sources have alleged that Paltrow and Martin had an open marriage. So whooooooooo cares!?
The most important revelation here, obviously, is that a business voluntarily named itself "Shaken Udder." And you're expected to go suck thick milk out of it. [DailyMail]
Candace Cameron Bure would like you to know that she is a SEXUAL WOMAN. But also, Jesus.
"You know, I feel like a sexual woman — I've been married for 18 years," Bure, 37, told co-host Erin Andrews on Monday, March 24. "I am a sexual woman. But, you know, I want to reserve certain things for my husband. So we did, I think, the best that we could with the rumba that I still felt comfortable doing."
In this week's episode, Bure made it known to her partner Mark Ballas, 27, and the dancing competition's costume designer's that she would not be baring a lot of skin during the season. When she spoke of her religious faith during a pre-taped package, the crowd awaiting her performance could be heard cheering from the sidelines.
"I'm a Christian. My life revolves around my relationship with Jesus Christ," she said at the time. "So with the overall tone of the dance and the costumes I'm not going to take a backseat. My voice will definitely be heard."
Okey dokey, Deej! [Us]
- Russell Crowe met the pope, but he DOESN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. [Variety]
- Angelina Jolie met with Syrian refugees. [Twitter]
- Cameron Diaz is down with "unconscious uncoupling." (It certainly beats "unconscious coupling," which is a side effect of Ambien.) [Us]
- James Franco says that Lindsay Lohan lied on her sex list and HE NERVER ERVER PUT IT IN THERE. [DailyMail]
- Miley Cyrus and Emma Roberts had friend-sushi. [E!]
- North West did not wear any makeup at her Vogue shoot. #wokeuplikethis #inplasticpantsfilledwithhotpoo [E!]
- Nina Dobrev and Nikki Reed would like you to please get health insurance. [JustJared]
- Wait, Simon Cowell's wife is just a regular celebrity now? That was fast. Anyhoo, she doesn't eat carbs or something. [E!]
- Check out Oprah's bountiful garden. [E!]
- Britney Spears "got goofy." [JustJared]
- Mumford & Sons did not break up. [E!]
- Everyone's hating on Anne Hathaway's nylons. But they wouldn't be hating if they were parent chaperones at one of my choir concerts in 1996! PERFECT OPACITY, ANNE. UNIFORM COMPLIANT. HERE, HAVE A LEMON DROP. [E!]
- It is Mariah Carey's birthday. Enjoy these feelings.
Images via Getty.