Women In Stock Photos Do Not Trust Birth Control

Women featured in stock photos have busy, complicated lives. They're laughing alone with all kinds of salads, both with and without croutons. They're diversely inept at riding bikes. They fly into unpredictable hysterics in the presence of a scale. But there's one thing that most stock photo women agree on: birth… » 9/22/14 4:30pm 10 minutes ago

Rick Perry Uses Joan Rivers' Death to Justify Awful Texas Abortion Law

In a recent speech, America's least likable Reptoid Rick Perry drew an idiotic and completely specious parallel between the harsh and medically unnecessary abortion restrictions in his state and Joan Rivers' recent tragic death. If you were ever worried that anti-choice politicians had run out of stupid and offensive… » 9/22/14 3:50pm 50 minutes ago

Paula Deen to Return to Today One Year After Meltdown

For those of you wondering exactly what butter enthusiast Paula Deen has learned in the year since that god-awful Today show interview following accusations of racism — and being let go from the Food Network — the Deen-ster will be returning to the show on Tuesday. » 9/22/14 2:15pm Today 2:15pm

GQ Tries to Attract Millennials and Olds With Blake Griffin's Abs

GQ is trying to bridge the digital divide, reaching out to The Olds and the Millennials with fashionable, athletic bodies neither sector can achieve unless they are NBA star Blake Griffin. So the editors just put Griffin on the cover, saving themselves the trouble of identifying a regular human being to reach his… » 9/22/14 1:45pm Today 1:45pm

Miss America Was Kicked Out of Her Sorority for Abusive Hazing

On paper, Miss America 2015 Kira Kazantsev reads like a forward-thinking person's dream of what a beauty queen could be. She's a trilingual honors student who's publicly passionate about women's health and down to clown with Jimmy Kimmel; she's got a squeaky-clean image and a squeaky-clean resume. But it's missing one… » 9/22/14 1:30pm Today 1:30pm

Study That Says Women Are Grumpy 10 Days a Year Can Fuck Itself

A new study from an English vitamin company has found that the average woman spends approximately 10 days a year in a "grumpy" mood. Well, either the ladies of the UK are the cheeriest bunch of broads you'll ever meet or this study is totally wack because most of the women I know are pissed-off for about 10 hours a… » 9/22/14 1:00pm Today 1:00pm

These Bright Pink Timbs Will Blind You With Breast Cancer Awareness

For those who want to literally stomp out cancer (or rather stomp out cancer-screening resources like Planned Parenthood but then haphazardly decide not to) while stomping all over fashion decency, these limited edition Susan G. Komen Timberland boots should do the trick. » 9/22/14 12:40pm Today 12:40pm

Whip-Smart 11-Year-Old Ferguson Kid Is Probably Our Future President

In St. Louis, Mo., the next black political superstar might’ve revealed himself — he’s 11. Recently, Marquis Govan took on the St. Louis City Council, and CBS’ Jane Pauley, explaining that they’re focusing on the looting in Ferguson, Mo. but real problems, like job creation, aren’t being solved. 11-year-olds know… » 9/22/14 12:20pm Today 12:20pm

Here's Why the Men in Your Life Forget Everything All the Time

Ever find yourself speaking to your husband, father, brother, best dude friend, and realize he's a little fuzzy on the details of the day about which you are reminiscing in great detail? Go easy on him, because it may be that men just aren't as good with memories about the Christmas when Spot got into the cinnamon… » 9/22/14 11:20am Today 11:20am