Maybe Don't 'Prank' Your Boyfriend By Prank Breaking Up With Him

Here's the thing about April Fools': It sucks. Pranks are all well and good when you're five years old and the only thing you can do is drool and make up some joke about being a space monster or something, but when you're an adult and try to raise the stakes, that shit gets real. Here's a tip from me to you: Never… » 4/01/15 2:30pm A minute ago

Janelle Monáe Finds Her Flow in New Track 'Yoga' 

"Yoga," a new single from Janelle Monáe featuring Jidenna, comes to us from Monáe's upcoming five-track Eephus EP. » 4/01/15 2:15pm 16 minutes ago

How Restaurants Get Free Labor Out of Servers and Bartenders

Would it seem absurd to read that most restaurants in America get a significant amount of essentially free labor out of servers and bartenders for work that has nothing to do with serving or bartending? If so, it's also such a basic, universal fact of the industry that almost no one even comments on it at this point. » 4/01/15 2:00pm 31 minutes ago

Zayn Malik Is Over, Loses 50,000 Followers After Quitting 1D

It's been less than a week since Zayn Malik broke up the greatest band in history to live a normal life, and the 22-year-old is already learning that being normal means that there are 50,000 less people who care about your day or your new solo work. In fact, those 50,000 people that just unfollowed you? They actively… » 4/01/15 1:45pm 46 minutes ago

Katy Perry Channels Noted Style Icon Kris Jenner

Katy Perry just debuted a suspect new haircut on this April Fools' Day with the ominous caption: "I asked for the Kris Jenner." She could have just asked for "a pixie cut with a heavy bang" and gotten the same effect, but fine. » 4/01/15 1:30pm Today 1:30pm

What the Hell Is Going On At American Apparel? 

One by one, the remnants of "old" American Apparel have been stripped away. The company recently fired longtime creative directors Marsha Brady and Iris Alonzo—the latter of whom, according to our sources and as corroborated by an earlier report by Fashionista, was canned without warning, explanation, or… » 4/01/15 1:15pm Today 1:15pm

No Self-Respecting Gay Couple Would Have Pizza at Their Wedding

Memories Pizza in Walkerton, Indiana has taken a stand: They'll serve gay people if they must, but they're not going to cater gay weddings because it's against their religion. What's not against their religion? Being dumb enough to believe a gay couple would have greasy-ass Indiana pizza at their wedding. » 4/01/15 1:00pm Today 1:00pm

Everything You Never Wanted to Know About a Duggar's First Kiss

A dispatch from the lip-locking Duggars beat: Jessa and her new husband Ben decided they might wait until marriage for their first kiss—but that didn't mean it had to be in front of hundreds of attendees, or on camera. Please note the speed with which they book it to the back of the church. » 4/01/15 12:45pm Today 12:45pm

Hospitalized Joni Mitchell Is 'Awake and In Good Spirits'

On Tuesday, news broke that Joni Mitchell had been found unconscious and rushed to the hospital. Today, NPR reports that the musician is "awake and in good spirits." » 4/01/15 12:30pm Today 12:30pm

What Happens When a Major-Label Pop Star Writes Her Album Herself? 

Written by Marina alone and produced with only one collaborator, Marina and the Diamonds' new, icily technicolor, Italo-disco-and-alt-rock-tinged FROOT is a major anomaly among major-label pop albums: Today's biggest female pop artists are almost to a rule great songwriters, but not a single one of them would turn out… » 4/01/15 12:10pm Today 12:10pm

On Game of Thrones, Sansa and Arya Are Ready to Connive and Kill

Game of Thrones returns on April 12 but instead of gods and men as the focus, the fifth season is shaping up to all about the women, including Arya and Sansa Stark, as they mature into their own power. SPOILER ALERT. » 4/01/15 11:50am Today 11:50am

Professional Hatemonger Bryan Fischer Is Very Worried About 'Big Gay'

The internet was given a glorious gift yesterday by talk radio host Bryan Fischer, the former "issues director" for the American Family Association and and a complete loon who believes — literally — that America is controlled by a vast, shadowy cabal of glittery and terrifying homosexuals. Monday afternoon, he tweeted… » 4/01/15 11:30am Today 11:30am

6'1" Eric Stonestreet to 5'5" Valerie Bertinelli: 'Move Out of the Way'

On Monday night, 5-foot 5-inch Valerie Bertinelli was watching Van Halen perform on Jimmy Kimmel Live! Behind her, 6-foot 1-inch Eric Stonestreet was taking a video of Van Halen performing on Jimmy Kimmel Live! Stonestreet, the taller of the two, said the following to Bertinelli, the shorter of the two. » 4/01/15 11:10am Today 11:10am

Here are Cara Delevingne and Pharrell Singing a Duet for Karl and Bey

Supermodel-turnt-actor Cara Delevingne has been working with Pharrell on an album (of music!) as of late, and Tuesday in New York at Karl Lagerfeld's Chanel Métiers d'Art presentation, the duo debuted the fruits of that labor. She has nice tone but um, this clip is a tad pitchy, if you will. And because of that: on a… » 4/01/15 10:50am Today 10:50am

Cool Guy Chet Haze Wants to Fight 'Jheri-Curled Cunt' Howard Stern

Chet Haze, the frat boy rapper son of Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, has escalated his strange feud with Howard Stern, which began in 2011 when Stern mocked his music career. "Howie.. Do you have any idea how badly I am going to assault you when I see you... You can't run from me forever knock knees," he wrote during a… » 4/01/15 10:30am Today 10:30am

Gawker Teen Knocks Out 60-Year-Old Man in Single Blow at Philly Train Station | io9 Incredible New Artifacts Found In 2,000-Year-Old Mexican Tunnel | Jalopnik Everything You Need To Know From The New York Auto Show — Day One | Kotaku When Japan Gets April Fools' Day So Right | » 4/01/15 10:22am Today 10:22am

Yes, That's Wilson Phillips on Kanye & Rihanna's 'FourFiveSeconds'

"FourFiveSeconds," the Kanye West and Rihanna song that revitalized Paul McCartney's career, apparently didn't just stop with the former Beatle: Billboard reveals that another old fave got a re-up on the jammer, and that's none other than the perennially harmonizing, posi-core girl-power trio Wilson Phillips. » 4/01/15 10:10am Today 10:10am

Matthew McConaughey Will Make $135,000 for That Commencement Speech 

Plus travel expenses, plus a $20,250 fee to Celebrity Talent International. Just in case you were in the market! » 4/01/15 9:50am Today 9:50am

Noose Found Hanging from Tree on Duke University Campus

A noose made with yellow rope was found hanging from a tree on the Duke University campus in Durham, North Carolina around 3 a.m. today. In an email to students, Larry Moneta, the school's Vice President for Student Affairs, wrote, "I can't begin to describe the disgust and anger I felt, and still feel." » 4/01/15 9:30am Today 9:30am

Texas Wants to Cut HIV Funding and Teach More About Abstinence

Because it totally makes sense for the state that has the fifth highest teen pregnancy rate in the country, the state of Texas wants to cut funding for programs to prevent HIV and other STIs and boost programs that teach abstinence instead. » 3/31/15 11:50pm Yesterday 11:50pm

The Mattress Reimagined: Casper Delivers Comfort to You + Special Offer

Despite spending a third of our time in bed, mattress shopping remains a dreaded activity. It's a soulless experience riddled with ambiguous terms, a lack of brand differentiation, smarmy sales people, and marked-up prices from major retail chains. Then there's Casper, who, with a direct-to-consumer model and a … » 3/31/15 4:30pm Yesterday 4:30pm

Get a Free Month of Oyster Reading: Choose from Over One-Million Titles

Oyster, the streaming app often referred to as the Netflix for books, offers more than one-million titles to choose from instantly. Get a one-month free trial to explore and enjoy the selection. If you get hooked on the service after the trial, pay just $9.95/month. » 3/27/15 2:30pm Friday 2:30pm