Attention whores are the Rodney Dangerfields of the world: They get no respect. It's not hard to see why. They hurl themselves at the spotlight and writhe pathetically in its ethereal glow, all but begging us — and sometimes outright begging us — to look at them, no matter how awkward, how painful, how sad, how pitiful. We get to have it both ways, too: We look, we linger, and then we play judge and jury. Then they get all invaded-feeling and just want some normal peace and quiet. I didn't ask for this! HA, we say, HA! Because they always come back. BTW, the people we label this way are also mostly women.
Shut It Down! Amazon's New Fan Fiction Platform Does Not Allow Porn
Good news for those of you who've spent the last 15-years sitting on piles of Newsies fan fiction that you don't know what to do with (in other words, good news, me). Amazon is now launching a fan fiction platform that will allow you can publish and actually get paid for your work.
Sorry, Lactation Mafia: Neanderthals Breastfed for Only About a Year
A study of the barium levels in a Neanderthal child's fossilized molar suggests that the child had been breastfed exclusively for seven months, and completely weaned by 14 months—way earlier than the attachment-parented kids in last year's Time cover story
Kids Finally Learn to Put a Bag on It, and Teen Birth Rates Drop
Following trends from the past several years
Check Out Obama's Adorable Prom Pic
After last week's hellish scandal week, President Barack Obama could use a little PR break. What's this? Photos of a young Barry at his prom have unearthed and Michelle was not his date? Is that infidelity? Does this mean impeachment? IS HE WEARING MARIJUANA AROUND HIS NECK? Nope, this photo is just sweet and…
Hello Kitty Has Improbably Kept a Factory in Syria Open
Cartoon characters can perform lots of physics-defying sight gags. Sometimes, they can even cross over from Toon Town into the real-person world and cause portly private detectives no end of trouble. Or help Michael Jordan save Earth from aliens. Or scoop out large chunks of a child’s brain with all the practiced…
Finally, a Body Scrub That Doubles as Pretzel Dip
Haven’t you always wanted a body scrub that would wash away your belly button filth and make a serviceable dip for your pretzel sticks? Because that’s the direction the odiferous beauty industry is sloshing in right now — edible lotions, salves, oils, and scrubs that you can use to get into a guilt-free 9 ½ Weeks…
Congress May Soon Let Us Bring Dogs on Special Squee Trains
Good news, lovers of furry domestic mammals! The House of Representatives introduced legislation on Tuesday that would require Amtrak (the government-subsidized rail system that brings so much joy to so many commuters along the Northeastern corridor) to let passengers bring their dogs or cats on specially-designated…
Amanda Bynes is threatening to sue In Touch for running "fake" photos of herself along with the exclusive interview she gave them: possibly part of a new game show called That's Not My Flophouse! Take my wife! Please!
