Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

In the immortal words of R. Kelly, after the show it's the after party. Last night, Oscar-nominated A-list celebs flocked to the Vanity Fair bash, where they mingled with TV stars and luminaries of the music world. The dress code was half pretty, half sexy. It was a night of many beautiful mammaries. Some ladies let the girls out, so to speak.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Demure ebony and ivory: Julie Bowen, Fan Bingbing.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Jackie Collins and Mary Elizabeth Winstead also rock black and white.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Jane Fonda looks hot in a splotchy pattern, although it might be too tight to dance/aerobicise in.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Diane Kruger wears whimsical black and white, accessorizes with blue nails and Josh Jackson.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Juliette Lewis's dress was attacked by insects.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Sequins aren't enough for Alessandra Ambrosio, she also needs see-through fabric.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Some more white/pale colors: Kelly Lynch's gold star arm cuff is badass. (Closer look!)

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Rose Byrne, absolutely smashing in ivory.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

White, but not quite right: Molly Sims, Mamie Gummer.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Emmy Rossum does ethereal Greco-Roman goddess, complete with awe-inspiring headpiece. Love!

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Natalie Portman and Benjamin Millepied are formal but not stiff.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Marisa Tomei's encrusted evening jumpsuit looks comfortable and fun. Irina Shayk is covered up by a lot of fabric, except where she isn't.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

This is obviously a very pretty gown on Zooey Deschanel, but it just looks washed-out, monochromatic and blah. Snooze girl.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

A better, more exciting version of a tan/beige dress: Selena Gomez.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Allison Williams does her best Upper East Side charity socialite.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Kate Bosworth shows off her gams in one of the few short dresses.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Pale lilac ruffles on Rosie Huntington-Whitely, who is so pretty I want to barf. And she gets to sleep with Jason Statham. Arg.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Olivia Munn wants to know why you are looking at curve of her breast. Do you mind? Don't look at her thigh, either. How do we feel about his very revealing dress that is literally hanging together by threads?

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

YES PEOPLE ARE LOOKING AT YOU CALM DOWN.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

This icy blue dress Anne Hathaway picked isn't much better than what she wore to the awards. Boring.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

On to some brighter colors: Carolyn Murphy and Alice Eve look fab in coral-y red.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Kerry Washington's dress is better here than on the Oscars carpet, where the sun and camera flashes washed out the color. Hot red is a great hue for Judy Greer.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Hilary Swank's red ball gown is very similar to Sally Field's, except for the part where you can see right through it. It's like she's wearing a short nightgown with a sheer peignoir over it. No likey.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Ooh, Amanda Seyfried. Wow. Like this even better than what she wore to the awards ceremony.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Patricia Clarkson gleefully embraces the plunging neckline trend.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Soft, lovely pattern on Elizabeth Banks.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Leslie Mann has a '70s thing going on; Solange is a luminous ray of sunshine.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Green is good: Amy Poehler.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Nude/sheer/illusion/see-through fabric and indigo beading on Lily Collins. The back is better than the front.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

More blues: Isla Fisher and Emily Mortimer.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Ginnifer Goodwin's shimmery blue is the best in this bunch, but Tory Burch and Chelsea Handler both look great.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Naomi Campbell has me singing blue velvet and that little boy's smile/blue velvet with that slow southern style/a new religion that'll bring ya to your knees/blue velvet if you please.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

In the navy: Greta Gerwig, Catherine O'Hara, Maria Sharapova.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

One shoulder/draping for Gabrielle Douglas and Natasha Barnard.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Going into the darkness: Courtney Crangi and Jenna Lyons; Eve Hewson and Bono; Donna Karan.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Plunging neckline and sheer fabric: Miranda Kerr.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Back to black: Jennifer Westfeldt, Arianna Huffington, Anna Paquin.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Kristin Chenoweth changed into a different black dress; this one is less pageant.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Collars and comfort: Fran Lebowitz , Jane Lynch, Sarah Silverman.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Holy shit! The legendary Faye Dunaway. GLOVES.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

More see-through fabric! Liberty Ross shows off; Karolina Kurkova attempts to make weird sheer panels look good.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

What in the world? See-through sleeves, leather, eyelet… Hailee Steinfeld's dress is confuzzling.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Foxy dark shimmer: Rashida Jones, Joan Collins.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

See-through fabric and almost sideboob: Amber Heard.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Zoe Saldana and Laura Dern: Plunging necklines for those on sternum watch.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Now this looks like a party: Dig Kate Beckinsale's flirty frock and gold eyeliner.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Which brings us to the metallics! Naomi Watts swapped her silver Oscar gown for black and gold sequins. Disco chic!

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Sideboob alert AND underboob alert: Chrissy Teigen's see-through fabric allows strangers to give her a visual breast exam.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Silver and gold? Yes, Clea Duvall. Yes.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Minnie Driver takes yet another plunging neckline, makes it classy and spectacular. Haven't seen her in anything lately. Miss her! She was so great on Will and Grace.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Diane von Furstenberg sparkles in titanium.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Amy Adams shines in body-hugging mercury.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

I don't know what color this is on Vanessa Hudgens — copper? bronze? — but I dig it.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Shiny yet meh: Michelle Rodriguez, Kelly Preston.

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Yowza. Paula Patton wows in white gold, and you've gotta love the amazing accessories (aka the boobs and the husband).

Cleavage, Sideboob and See-Through Dresses at the Vanity Fair Oscar PartyS

Best: Jennifer Lawrence, in platinum, looking amazing again. Just like a winner.

Images via Getty.