Douchebag Soap Claims It Can Cure Dudes of 'Mangina'

Ohhhhhh ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! "Mangina." Yes, nothing is quite so funny as the notion of a man having a lady-cavern instead of a man-rod! Can you imagine? A man with a vagina? Why, it'd be almost like being...a WOMAN. Or a man. With a vagina. And then who would rule the earth with penisy wisdom and might? Because, as everyone knows, vaginas are dread black holes that absorb all traces of intelligence, humor, and taste.

Douchebag Soap Claims It Can Cure Dudes of 'Mangina'

Meet the Duke Cannon soap company, self-proclaimed eradicators of Mangina. Charming.

When you click on the "What Is Mangina?" button, the site takes you to a list of helpful diagnostic information, accompanied by a photo of a sort of Rob-Van-Winkle-lite poster boy. Symptoms include shopping at Hollister, listening to LMFAO, getting bottle service at da clurb, and driving a BMW. Causes include "abundant use of feminine shower gels," which apparently "leave an invisible, estrogen-like enzyme that leads to the development of Mangina."

Douchebag Soap Claims It Can Cure Dudes of 'Mangina'

But fear not, penis-havers:

DUKE CANNON SOAP IS ESPECIALLY DESIGNED TO REMOVE INVISIBLE ESTROGEN PARTICLES THAT SHOWER GELS LEAVE BEHIND. IT IS SOAP FOR MEN WHO WORK HARD AND WANT TO GET CLEAN.

Douchebag Soap Claims It Can Cure Dudes of 'Mangina'

You know what? What you're describing sounds less like a man with a vagina and more like a super generic and mildly annoying dudebro. If you want to rail against super generic and mildly annoying dudebros, BE MY GUEST. But quit throwing women and trans men and all reasonable humans under the bus in the process. By acting like a spoiled child who's afraid of yucky estrogen cooties (newsflash—men have estrogen too, Dr. Sanjay Gupta), you're acting exactly like the dumb dude stereotype you're supposedly scrubbing away with your magic soap. Be a man and respect women.