I know this doesn't really deserve to be the lead story, but it's FRIDAY. I DO WHAT I WANT. FART JOKES FOR EVERYONE. Christina Aguilera went on Ellen and told the whole world that Cee-Lo has gas problems. Like, butt-gas. (The funniest gas of all!!!)
You know, us as coaches, we kind of hit our stride, we get what it's all about, we're invested in our teams—but I'm sitting next to Blake the whole time, so how can I not laugh? Between him and Cee-Lo with his gas over there, and then there's Adam over there, very competitive...that's why I have the fan, you know...I love you, Cee-Lo, don't be mad.
Cee-Lo Green is a fart machine. [BuzzFeed]
It's come to light that Psy, the internet's favorite wide-marching nonsense-monger, released a song in 2004 about "killing fucking Yankees." And now he is very, very sorry.
Among the incendiary lyrics: "Kill those f—king Yankees who have been torturing Iraqi captives/Kill those f—king Yankees who ordered them to torture/Kill their daughters, mothers, daughter-in-law and fathers/Kill them all slowly and painfully."
..."The song I was featured in-eight years ago-was part of a deeply emotional reaction to the war in Iraq and the killing of two Korean schoolgirls that was part of the overall antiwar sentiment shared by others around the world at that time. While I'm grateful for the freedom to express one's self, I've learned there are limits to what language is appropriate and I'm deeply sorry for how these lyrics could be interpreted. I will forever be sorry for any pain I have caused by those words," he added.
Well, uh, good then. [E!]
Ewan McGregor says he has "no plans" to stop showing everybody his penis.
"Being naked is something that happens in either end of the day for me, and if you're lucky, somewhere in the middle as well," he says on the show, airing this weekend. "And I don't understand why it's an issue.
"I don't take my clothes off in movies because I want to flash my body around. I took my clothes off for movies because I'm an actor."
IT'S BEEN A BIG, BRAVE YEAR FOR HIM AND HIS PENIS AS ACTORS. [E!]
- Brooke Mueller—a.k.a. the former Mrs. Charlie Sheen—was hospitalized after an overdose. She is currently conscious and responsive. [TMZ]
- Waaaaaaahhhhh, it's the last 30 Rock table read ever. [BuzzFeed]
- Will Carly Rae Jepsen win "Song of the Year"? Or will it be my personal pick, [falls into boredom coma, never to recover]!?!??!? [MTV]
- The "lady" part of Lady Antebellum is pregnant. I feel like there's a pun to be made here, but...it's Friday. [E!]
- Did you want to know a bunch of details from Notorious B.I.G.'s autopsy report? Merry Christmas. [TMZ]
- Composer John Williams really really really wanted James Taylor to have the lead role in Lincoln. [Reuters]
- "Weigh in" on Sophia Bush's new bangs. [E!]
- Former Girl Next Door Bridget Marquardt confirms that Hef's wedding to Crystal Harris will take place on New Year's Eve, and she will not be attending. Discussion topic: Bridget Marquardt was obviously the best of the girls next door because Kendra was annoying and Holly was a robot. Y/N/IDK. [E!]
- SHENAE GRIMES IS ENGAGED. TO A BIG-BOOBIE SNAKE. (DEGRASSI REFERENCE.) [People]