So, that virgin auction just ended, and we have a winner. And by winner, we mean enormous loser, because what grown man buys a virgin off the internet? He's obviously not looking for a great sexual experience, and if it's for the novelty of having sex with a woman with an intact hymen, that's iffy seeing as that thing can break in a million different ways that don't involve a penis — so what's the fucking deal? Are we on the set of Taken 3? Hold me, Liam Neeson.
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