Nicholas "Hemingway" Sparks sure has his formula down pat. Sad hot white lady meets sad hot white dude. Someone is dead. Someone dies. They fall in love in a quaint small town. They sit in a canoe. They bone in the rain. Trials. Tribulations. Trust that the audience will all be a the right point in their menstrual cycle for this saccharine bullshit to be mildly palatable. Make millions, buy a bunch of black t-shirts and start over.

This time the author/creator of Dear John, The Notebook and Cancer Girlfriend: My Girlfriend Has Cancer brings us Safe Haven, the story of a blonde haircut (Julianne Hough) who, on the lam from the law, seeks protection in a seaside town and in the loving thrusts of a local widower (Josh Duhamel). Lasse Hallstrom (Cider House Rules, Chocolat) is directing.

Yaaaaaaaay?