Is Your Vagina Too Cold and Too Fat? These Insane Pants Are For You!

Meet Zaggora, the clothing that helps you become less fat for hella money CHA CHING! So you’re totally constricted, blasting your body with infrared rays, and walking in a pool of your own vaginal secretions. Which, I guess, the fabric also wicks away, but if you’re sweating 80% more, where is it wicking it all? Into your vagina? Seriously, what is happening here, scientifically?

I wish that everyone who bought this body modification bullshit in the guise of looking healthy (read: thin) would just put their funds into doing something actually healthy — like take a funky fresh dance class, go to delicious dinner with friends, or rent a funny movie. All of that stuff has to be better for your health than having infrared death rays shooting at your pelvis.