'Pro-Life Without Exception' Congressman Thinks Women Can't Die from Pregnancy, Thanks to 'Science'

Another health expert from that radical women’s advocacy group we call the US House of Representatives has offered a great science-based justification for why abortion should not be available to any woman under any circumstances — not even to save her life. According to Illinois Republican Joe Walsh, allowing women to terminate pregnancies when their lives are at risk isn’t necessary, because thanks to “advances in science and technology,” it’s physically impossible for a pregnancy to kill a woman. Quick — somebody tell that to the more than half a million women per year who die as a result of pregnancy complications. Science says you’re still alive!

The asinine remarks came after a debate between Tea Party incumbent Walsh and former VA Head Tammy Duckworth. During the debate, the “pro-choice without restriction” Duckworth claimed that Walsh would let a woman die rather than allowing her to have an abortion. After the debate, Walsh clarified that liberals only say that pregnancy can kill a woman as a way to make people like Joe Walsh look like stupid braying jackasses. But Joe Walsh isn’t fooled by your gotcha medicine!

This is an issue that opponents of life throw out there to make us look unreasonable. There’s no such exception as life of the mother. And as far as health of the mother, same thing. With advances in science and technology, health of the mother has become a tool for abortions any time for any reason.

So women with pre-eclampsia, placenta praevia, any of the bummer rainbow of cancers, kidney disease, gestational diabetes, HELLP syndrome, epilepsy, placental abruption, or any other possibly life-threatening pregnancy condition: quit your partisan whining. Joe Walsh knows that thanks to new “science,” (to which apparently only Joe Walsh is privy) your problems are just excuses to host a scraping hoedown in your uterus. Stop trying to make Joe Walsh look unreasonable. It’s unfeminine.

Walsh has been, to use the proper political term, one of Congress’s most prolific turds. He’s a raging xenophobe, once urging the President to defend the US/Mexico border with “moats and alligators,” he thinks that no social safety nets should exist because it’s not in the Constitution, he doesn’t believe in global warming, and was sued by his ex wife over more than $100,000 in unpaid child support. Earlier this year, he threw a fit about how his opponent, who lost both legs while serving in the Iraq war, talks about her military service too much. But these comments — that women can’t die from pregnancy because SCIENCE — are by far the cherry on the shit sundae that has been Joe Walsh’s political career. You can almost hear Todd Akin AMEN-ing all the way from Missour-uh. John McCain’s dickfingers are nodding approvingly.

The one million children orphaned globally by maternal death every year could not be reached for comment. Must be busy playing with all that modern technology.