Just days after Us Weekly editor Janice Min urged the public to stop the single-minded "mom shell" mentality—criticizing celebrities like Hilary Duff and Bryce Dallas Howard for not dropping postpartum weight fast enough—it should come as no surprise that the woman that Goop Paltrow credits for getting rid of her self-described "bat wings" and "flabby ass" would have little sympathy for the fitness routine of the postpartum everywoman.
Workout guru Tracy Anderson has also worked with Madonna and Jennifer Lopez, but her intense (and expensive, and time-consuming diet and exercise program) isn't exactly the most accessible one on the market for us Muggles. Anderson told DuJour Magazine:
A lot of women use pregnancy as an excuse to let their bodies go, and that's the worst thing. I've seen so many women who come to me right after [having children] with disaster bodies that have gone through hell, or they come to me years later and say, ‘Oh, my body is like this because I had three kids.'"
She also pointed out that she only gained 30 lbs during her pregnancy, and dropped it all in six weeks. Only, in her mind, Anderson likely refers to this period of time not as "pregnancy" and "birth" but as "the days I was fat" and "the day I lost a bunch of weight without even doing all of my step exercises! What is that little tiny screaming?" [Radar Online, ABC News]
Once upon a time, a child called Courtney Stodden married something much older called a Doug Hutchison, and it was dark and sad, and she had this faux-"titillating," alliterative Twitter, and then they went away for awhile and we all breathed a sigh of relief. Well, just like that number from Sondheim's Follies, They're Still Here, and she turned 18 and he gave her "a little boy Italian Greyhound named Dourtney." And there you have it. [ E! Online]
Harry Wales and the Tri-Blizzard Tournament: Allegedly, there were copious amounts of cocaine flying around in the Vegas hotel room that housed Prince Harry, Prince Harry's bare ass and all of those random naked women. [Radar Online]
Judging by these photos, Matthew McConaughey appears to be at the tail end of his drastic 30-lb weight loss for an upcoming film, The Dallas Buyers Club, in which he plays a man with AIDS. Here he is arriving on the set of Wolf of Wall Street. "For me, it's more of a mental thing than a physical thing. I'll get down to the weight I need to get to. I'm on my way, and it's what I need to do for the job... It's a bit of a spiritual cleanse, mental cleanse. I'm drinking a lot of tea." Good Lord, those pictures. [Daily Mail]
It's the end of an era: Lindsay Lohan, the earnest Austrian nun whose over-enthusiastic singing prompted the convent to send her to a bourgeoise, motherless family who at first seems cold and aloof but actually desperately needs her, has been banned from the Chateau Marmont for ducking out on her $46,350.04 bill. During her 47-day stay, here's what she spent, via TMZ:
Minibar charges for the 47 days: $3,145.07. The highest daily tab ... July 1st — $502.43!!!
Cigarettes: $686. She blew through 49 packs in 47 days at $14 a pop
— Chateau Candle: $100
— Chateau restaurant: On July 4 Lindsay racked up a $1,992.07 bill. On top of that, she spent $685.96 that day on room service.
She's been ordered to get her stuff out of the room by noon on August 1st, and then deemed persona non grata forever. [TMZ]
Many moons ago, or I'd only assume many moons ago as the timeframe isn't disclosed, George Clooney had a fling with Real Housewives Of New York's Carole Radziwill. Although she says she doesn't kiss and tell, she tweeted that if she did, she'd say that he was "a very good kisser" and totally ASTOUND US ALL. So despite what you may have believed, George Clooney is good at the fuckz. Moving on. [Us Weekly]
- Adrienne Maloof and Dr. Paul Nassif of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are filing for divorce. [NYDN]
- Selena Gomez bought Jonah Hill's $2.9 million dollar house. [Entertainment.ie]
- A fan stole Tom Hanks' glasses and pretended to be drunk and he got the best photograph out of it. [E! Online]
- The Beebs sat on top of a gigantic Mercedes SUV in the brightest yellow pants of all time. [The Sun]
- Pregnant Adele had to miss the Notting Hill Festival, so her boyfriend Simon Konecki arranged a similarly-themed party at their house. Love is love, is love, is :D. [The Sun]
- Guitarist Slash walked in on his mom doing it with David Bowie one time. Happens to the best of us. [Rolling Stone]
- Russell Brand and Geri Halliwell like each other because of yoga. [Monsters and Critics]
- Paula Abdul and her medicine cabinet might come back to TV. [HuffPo]
- One of these "5 Things You Didn't Know About John Stamos" is, surprisingly, not that he hangs out at home with his entire body slathered in Oikos, smirking into the middle distance. [People]
- Bill and Giuliana Rancic are hanging, fly-fishing and Tweeting in Vail, Colorado as they await the birth of their child via surrogate in Denver. [People]
- What in the shitballs is up with Penn Badgley's hair? [People]
- After yesterday's rumors, Hilaria Thomas is like "No, I'm not pregnant, you assholes." [E! Online]
- This photo of Queen Elizabeth at the wheel of a range rover wearing a hoodie is worth more than my life. [Us Magazine]
- One emotional hour-long phone call later, Robert Pattinson has agreed to meet up with a "frantic" Kristen Stewart. [News.com.au]
- Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon have released some intimate family photos, Jay and Bey-style. [Bossip]
- Rihanna, Frank Ocean and Taylor Swift will be performing at MTV's VMAs. [People]
- Ed Westwick almost fisticuffed a man but they resolved their problems in French, more proof that Ed Westwick and his Gossip Girl character Charles P. Whitefish are one and the same. [Page Six]
- Speaking of which, Kelly Rutherford lost her custody case against her ex-husband, who it was ruled is allowed to keep their two children in France. [TMZ]