Look, talking about bowel health isn't pleasant, which is why it's relegated to squeamish doctor's visits, euphemistic Pepto Bismol ads scored by fart symphonies, and the pencil-mustachioed, infomercial snake oil purveyor Klee Irwin, but we need to talk about it because, well, it's important. It's especially important if it turns out that medical, ahem, marijuana can ease the symptoms of diarrhea, which palliative effect on your digestive system may be the one thing that will finally make smoking weed completely uncool.
The Weed Blog happily reports that marijuana can be an effective treatment for mud butt, which is apparently a thing people call diarrhea when they want to be especially vivid. How do we know this is true? People in India have apparently been using marijuana as a bowel regulator since 1886, although back then they used it as part of formula comprised of "cannabis tincture, chloroform and morphine." Wild. Nowadays, just smoking weed sans heavy opiates should do the trick (if you trust the weed bloggers for medical advice). Weed can also be used, adds The Village Voice, to treat sundry other gastrointestinal ailments, such as loose stool (sorry) and Crohn's disease. Moreover, it might also be used to help make cold leftovers from two-day-old Greek take-out delicious, thereby obviating the need to reheat said leftovers and saving you money on your energy bill. Ipso facto, smoking weed is good for the environment, too.
Medical Marijuana: Can It Treat Diarrhea? [Village Voice]
Does Medical Marijuana Help Treat Diarrhea [The Weed Blog]
Image via Gordon Swanson/Shutterstock.