The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

Last night, TV stars walked the red carpet for the second annual Critics' Choice Awards. On a television glamour scale, it was kind of basic cable.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

The simplest looks were the most elegant: Julianne Moore, Busy Phillips, and Gillian Anderson.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

Natalie Zea's earrings made her entire outfit. They're about Basketball Wives length.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

If only there wasn't a fishnet covering Ginnifer Goodwin's boobs. That's just too Rock of Love, no matter where the hemline is.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

Zooey Deschanel—who had the best nails of the evening—brought her mom.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

Is this color considered "blush" or "bashful": Cat Deeley, Beth Behrs, and Lucy Liu.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

LBDs: Alison Brie, Sarah Paulson, and Emily Deschanel.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

These were the few pops of color in a sea of mostly neutrals and blacks: RuPaul, Regina King, and Kate Walsh.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

Gowns: Olivia Munn, Katey Sagal, and Emmy Rossum.

The Middling Fashions of the Critics' Choice Awards

While Anna Gunn (left) and Aisha Tyler (right) have looked better, but Christina Hendricks has never looked worse. It's shocking that one of the most beautiful women can repeatedly make herself look so messy.