Jobs Make You Fat, Gyms Make You Rich

Do you have a job? Then bad news: You are probably fat. Or if you are not fat already, you are going to get fat. At least that is the conclusion one reaches after looking at the results of a new CareerBuilder survey about which jobs are most likely to make people gain weight. Is your job on the list? Almost certainly yes—unless your job consists of heavy manual labor.

Travel agents, lawyers, and judges have it the worst, according to the survey. Must be that the stress of planning other people's stressful travel takes a toll. You wouldn't think lawyers would have much trouble, since according to Law & Order, they're constantly walking and talking. But I guess in reality they do sit around a lot, probably because they can charge an insane amount for every hour they're parked in their chair. As for judges, I always suspected they did nothing but sit in their chambers eating endless sandwiches, and now it looks like maybe I'm right. (Related: does anyone know how I become a judge?) The rest of the list basically covers every other job in America:

• Social worker
• Teacher
• Artist/designer/architect
• Administrative assistant
• Physician
• Protective services (police, firefighter)
• Marketing/public relations professional
• Information technology professional

See? If you don't fall onto this list, consider yourself lucky, I suppose? But really if you work in any kind of office, you might still be at risk for the dreaded sitting disease that is killing us all slowly. Overall, this study found that two in five workers had gained weight in their current job. More than 25 percent had put on 10 pounds, and 14 percent gone up more than 20 pounds.

As for what's causing all of us to put on the pounds at the office, it appears that lunch is a big problem. Great, now we all have to skip lunch. J/K, that is not happening because we will fucking kill each other in that afternoon meeting if we do. Really, the biggest thing seems to be eating out at those mean restaurants who give us so much food. More than half of employees ate out at least once a week, and 23 percent did so three times a week. Also, depressingly, 10 percent of people said they ate lunch out of vending machine each week. I guess salads at desks are better for the waistline than giant buckets of delicious Chipotle or bags of Fritos from the machine. But it's hard enough to get to work on time, much less make a salad to bring with you. Also, there are all of those coworkers trying to feed you things and keep you down.

In addition to the eating, there's also the not exercising. Forty percent of the people surveyed said they didn't work out regularly, and 10 percent said they never go to the gym. Sure, you could hit the treadmill that your office is probably going to install right underneath your feet, or not. Who cares? You're basically just a brain with hands that type things anyway, so does it even matter if your muscles wither and you become a jiggly mass of flesh? Oops, yes, it might.

Another godforsaken study found that people who go to the gym regularly make nine percent more in salary on average than those who don't work out. This study tries to prove that it is the actual working out, and not the personality type (i.e. those who are motivated to work out might be more motivated at work and make more, etc.) that matters, but that seems a bit questionable. So, take it with a grain of salt…that you set on top of a delicious entrée that you eat at a nice restaurant during your lunch break.

10 Jobs That Can Make You Fat [LiveScience]
Want a 9% Raise? Hit the Gym [Smart Money]

Image via CREATISTA/Shutterstock.