Lindsay Lohan Is Desperately Searching for the Perfect Dick

The Lifetime biopic Liz & Dick — in which Lindsay Lohan will play Elizabeth Taylor — hasn't started filming yet, but there's already plenty of high drama… behind the scenes. The producer is being called an idiot for casting your girl LL; and now, Lindz is unhappy with her choices for Dick. Three actors are in the running to play Richard BurtonGossip Girl's sad dad Matthew Settle, Eastenders' Sean Maguire, and CSI 's Craig Robert Young. But according to a source, "Lindsay declared that none of the actors were the right fit and that she wanted to go to London to look for a possible Burton actor there," because, you know, she is producing and directing this TV movie. Oh, wait, no she's not. It's not in her job description to do the casting! Of course, she's under a lot of pressure. It's obvious that she wants to do a really good job, and part of that is having the right on-screen chemistry with her costar. Understandable that she'd get anxious about who will play the love of Liz Taylor's life. Still, a source snipes: "Lindsay is being an absolute nightmare about who should play Burton. She believes Matthew Settle is too old to play the role, and she wants a major A-list star to be her co-star. However, her salary for the role took up a major portion of the budget, and the Burton gig will likely only pay $200k, max. The producers don't need to get Lindsay's approval of who will play Richard Burton, but they want to keep her happy." [Radar, Related: NYT]


Lindsay Lohan Is Desperately Searching for the Perfect Dick

They broke up five years ago and she's since married Jamie Hince, but Pete Doherty has come forward to say that Kate Moss occasionally calls him when she's wasted -– which as we know is often. "She wants to get drunk and call me and talk shit. That's fine but I wouldn't be able to do that to her. Anyway, she's married," said the moral arbiter. "I've listened to her [on voicemail]. A couple of times she's got drunk and called me and been a bit silly. But she's a happily married woman, why does she want to speak to me? Maybe she's still in love with me." Going on to say that he thought she hated him, Doherty blames her friends for breaking them up and says he wishes they were together. "Every time we'd have an argument she'd say ‘All my friends are right about you,'" he added. "You know what, in a different world maybe we could [be together]. It's sad. But… it's all in her court." Though one should take everything he says with a grain of salt, it's pretty juicy so let's drink it down like our lives depends on saline. [Mirror]


Lindsay Lohan Is Desperately Searching for the Perfect Dick

Quelle surprise! Chris Brown has once again made an aggressive ass of himself in public. Hitting up Las Vegas nightclub Haze on Saturday, he spent a couple of hours "charming" a group of women by buying them endless bottles of champagne. Fancy! He then got pissed when these women dared not bend to his will and moved on without repaying his purchases in sexual kind. "Brown got visibly upset when the girls moved on to the next table. Brown approached the guys in the group [at the next table] and started getting visibly agitated. Brown stood up, and looked like he was about to start a fight when club security stopped him," said a witness. "He got in the guy's face and was cursing at him, and saying, ‘Are these girls with you or with me?' The guy was stunned by it. Things were close to getting extremely ugly." His rep has since called bullshit on the allegations, but a spokesperson for the club confirms shit went down: "Haze has a zero tolerance policy for violence." [Page Six]
Until he swings a punch Cheryl Cole says we should leave him be. [Daily Mail]


Lindsay Lohan Is Desperately Searching for the Perfect Dick

Katy Perry has surprised no one by splitting from her hunky rebound, Florence + the Machine guitarist Robert Ackroyd. Even he wasn't all that shocked. "It wasn't that serious. It's not a nasty thing and they are still talking, but Katy told him to do his thing and they'll talk soon," said a some big mouth/liar. "No hard feelings. She's really busy and so is he." [Us]


Lindsay Lohan Is Desperately Searching for the Perfect Dick

Speaking of Florence + the Machine, Florence Welch has a pretty interesting take on why she simply can't wear normal clothes and must always don designer outfits – one that we should all employ if we ever find ourselves in a situation where we don't control the purse strings and need an excuse for ridiculous clothing-related credit card charges. "My face isn't right for them," she explained. [Marie Claire]


Lindsay Lohan Is Desperately Searching for the Perfect Dick

Jenna Maroney of America's Kidz Got Singing will be proud to hear that Howard Stern made some seven-year-old cry on America's Got Talent. But he didn't get a kick out of making the wee aspiring rapper lose it and went up on stage to try and console him. "This job is too rough for me, I don't really wanna do it anymore," said Stern. "I'm not cut out for this, man. I'm not cut out for it. I'm shaking man, I'm shaking. I can't do it, man. I can't do it." [E!]


Lindsay Lohan Is Desperately Searching for the Perfect Dick

So You Think You Can Dance's Mary Murphy is a coked-up sex fiend, according to her former manager. Filing a lawsuit against the host, Michael Sanchez claims she likes the yayo and has had "many inappropriate sexual relationships with So You Think You Can Dance and Chelsea Lately crew members." Harlotry in the first degree! [NYDN]


  • Matt Lauer is trying to turn the Hamptons into his own personal horse farm. [Page Six]
  • SNL/Portlandia's Fred Armisen had something threatening to say about Krsiten Wiig's departure: "It was both sad and happy because no one ever leaves SNL." [Page Six]
  • SNL must be a fun place to work because Kristen's farewell shindig was on Rockerfeller Center's Skating Rink. [Us]
  • Gasp! Priscilla Chan, who recently wed Mark Zuckerberg, only spent $4,700 on her wedding dress. [Page Six]
  • Two "prominent crisis management gurus" -– amazing! -– say that John Travolta is handling the endless sex allegations like a champ. [NYDN]
  • Khloe Kardashian was clearly having a bad day and ignored some fans who wanted her autograph. I blame them for being ridiculous enough to want her autograph. [NYDN]
  • It seems to be taking forever to come out, but the new, slightly revised Dark Knight Rises poster suggests its release is imminent. [E!]
  • Demi Moore is back at work, playing Elizabeth Olsen's mom in Very Good Girls. [E!]
  • will.i.am — whose name I should really uppercase and lose the periods in protest -– is a flamer: He ran with the Olympic torch yesterday. [E!]
  • Ramona Singer's daughter Avery just attended prom -– even the youngins among us must be feeling old. [Us]
  • Today in cute: Kristen Stewart describes her rescue dog Bear as a baby. [People]
  • Usher is playing his cards right in court and crying when accused of being a bad dad. [TMZ]
  • She's been through enough lately so perhaps the Nevada Gaming Commission can calm down after learning that Bobbi Kristina may have had an underage bet at the MGM Grand over the weekend. [TMZ]
  • Tilda Swinton looks amazing in the latest issue of Candy magazine. [OMG]
  • Bar Refaeli rightly credits the fact she won Maxim's Hot List to the fact that she has boobs. [LA Times]
  • "Sleep in Leonardo DiCaprio's Bed For Just $150k Per Month!" [Radar]
  • Will Smith on playing Barack Obama: "It's about the ears, that's the thing. People see the ears and Barack and I both have the ears, so I'm the most natural choice. I told [Obama] jokingly, 'It's definitely something I would consider, you just have to write the ending.' So he's working on the ending right now." [Page Six]