37,000-Year-Old Caveman Porno Found in France

Hoh hoh hohhh!!! Bonjour! New anthropological findings suggest that horny French cavemen may have been just as into dirty pictures as any modern houseman. An excavation of a rock shelter in the Vezere River valley has turned up some illustrations that anthropologists are calling ''the oldest evidence of any kind of graphic imagery."

Unsurprisingly, somehow, it turns out that the world's oldest imagery isn't too far removed from the world's oldest profession. You know what I mean? Let's just say they're pictures of a different kind of woolly mammoth. Get it? What I mean is vulvas you guys. Cave-vulvas!!!

The drawings include what appear to be images of the female vulva, illustrated by circles with small slits on one side. ''You see this again and again and again,'' Professor White said. There are also very simple images, in profile, of animals, including horses and lion-like big cats, he said.

Of course we don't know what significance these paintings held at the very dawning of culture—whether their purpose was proto-religious or decorative or simply an example of doodlin' for cave-leisure. Pretty much the only thing I do know is that now I can't get the image of the Geico cavemen masturbating to a wall out of my head. So thanks a lot, France.

Photo credit (C) prill / Stockfresh.