Roving Porn Van Offering Free Breast Exams Today

This seems totally legit: a van plastered with images of busty women in low cut sexy nurse uniforms and festooned with pink ribbons is currently driving around New York City offering to show women how to properly examine their breasts. This is what happens when we cut funding to low cost women's health clinics: women who can't afford to go to the doctor have to resort to being felt up for free in porn vans.

The site sponsoring the breast awareness van (omission of the word "cancer" was deliberate) is Porn Hub, and today and today only can interested women have their breasts felt up by porn star Bree Olson. For free! Step right up, ladies and laddies!

I'm no boner expert (I only dabble in boners), but it seems like even though breasts exude eroticism to many straight men, the thought of breasts that are full of tumors seems like it may be sort of a bonerkiller. And a porn site probably doesn't want to associate itself with the murder of boners. Or, uh, murdery vans.

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