Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

Last night Bravo held its upfronts in NYC and aired it as a special hour-long, all-star Watch What Happens Live. With so many "Bravolebrities" and Housewives all in one room, there seemed to be an endless sea of shiny fabric and expensive shoes.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

The ironic thing about the O.C. Housewives—other than the fact that they repeatedly use the word "ironic" incorrectly—is that they (with the exception of the brunette) probably look down on porn stars, while at the same time aiming for that aesthetic.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

It's kind of surprising that Adrienne Maloof (center) was able to get along so well with Giggy seeing as how she has recently morphed into a cat. And is Lisa Vanderpump (second from left) wearing a negligee? I really hope that the poofy skirt becomes Kim Richard's new bow blouse.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

While they were comparatively elegant, Zoila Chavez, Jeff Lewis, and Jenni Pulos looked like they were going to a funeral. Andy Cohen wore a nice Easter-y tie and Padma Lakshmi was one of the only women in attendance not wearing about six pounds of makeup.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

The Countess is in a catsuit. A catsuit! Also, these two photos hint at some behind-the-scenes dramz. It would seem that Sonja Morgan refused to be photographed with the rest of the NYC cast.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

I guess Brad Goreski did think his Thom Browne pants were short enough, so he cuffed them.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

I know NeNe Leakes wants us all to think that she's very rich. Those shoes had to have cost over $2000. Yet she's never owned her home and got evicted before for not paying her rent.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

Tabatha Coffey also wore some expensive nut-crushers on her feet.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

MJ, Reza, and GG from The Shahs of Sunset. From what I've seen of the show, Reza is really full of himself and his look but to me he's totally Rooster, Miss Hannigan's brother when he's dressed up as Annie's father.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

Why doesn't Kathy Griffin just hire a stylist already? You know? Also, Bethenny Frankel joked about dealing with camel toe on WWH last night, but this is obviously no joke. And then there's pregnant Rosie Pope, who is expected to look good because she designs maternity clothes. When her show was on last summer she only had one baby. Now she's pregnant with her third.

Where Bankrupt Women Wear Louboutins, AKA the Bravo Upfronts

I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt that Melissa Gorga (second from left) is wearing one of the most disgusting dresses I have ever seen in my life. I mean, it looks like literal trash, like she yanked it out of her kitchen sink drain after somebody ran the garbage disposal on it.