Let me confess something to you. I was a male model in the 1980s. I know what you're thinking— I look way too young for that. First of all thank you, that's very flattering. Second of all, it's crazy— the twists and turns life brings. Back when I was young, looking at my dad's GQs and dreaming of modeling in clothes, I never imagined in my wildest dreams that I'd one day be posing naked for a centerfold (you're welcome, ladies). Likewise, when I was male modeling and hangin' with my two girlfriends, I never imagined that I'd end up a 25-year-old woman writing for Jezebel, but look at me now! I remember my first manager Gary—he would pick me up in this beat-up old Mercury Bobcat outside of the A&W where he first discovered me. He was the one who taught me to jump at every opportunity, whether it be strippin' down for a shoot or looking into this crazy new world called blogging. I guess I owe him a lot for where I am today. I'd send him a postcard to thank him, but he got shot in a motel outside Reno awhile back. He always said his debts would catch up to him and I reckon they eventually did.

Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say in my own backwards way is that this video brought back a lot of good memories. It even included my old friend Billy the photographer— he sure had a lot of chest hair. You never would of known at the time, but Billy's a registered sex offender now. I don't know— he really got wine, which I always thought was classy.

Hunks Be Hunks N' Creeps Be Creeps [Everything Is Terrible]