American Reunion Red Carpet Is Pretty Depressing

After the huge success of 1999's American Pie, the kids in the film were instant stars. Over the course of the next few years, their careers and personal lives all had very different trajectories—some were relegated to appearing in the various American Pie sequels while their former costars went on to star in Academy Award-winning films and their own TV shows. Well, after the highs of stardom and the lows of plastic surgery nightmares and crack addiction, they're all sadly back on equal ground. No one was too good to appear in American Reunion, or on the red carpet at the premiere.

American Reunion Red Carpet Is Pretty Depressing

Remember the last time Tara Reid brought out the twins on the red carpet?

American Reunion Red Carpet Is Pretty Depressing

A very pregnant Alyson Hannigan was definitely the cutest, but if I were her, I'd be wary of the inevitable MILF jokes.

American Reunion Red Carpet Is Pretty Depressing

Jennifer Coolidge looks about as comfortable in that strapless, pink lace thing as she looked good. One of the brighter moments was seeing Natasha Lyonne looking healthy and present after seeing her, in person, high as a kite and sickly. Cobie Smulders was one of the more put-together actresses at the premiere.

American Reunion Red Carpet Is Pretty Depressing

Mena Suvari's crystal-studded heels could've looked really cool if she hadn't paired them with such a Zsa-Zsa dress. She looks like she writes steamy romance novels.

American Reunion Red Carpet Is Pretty Depressing

What's weird is that while Shannon Elizabeth is totally mall right here, there's still this scary, haunted old lady thing going on above her shoulders that's really reminiscent of the grandmother from Flowers in the Attic.

American Reunion Red Carpet Is Pretty Depressing

I can only assume that Robert Hayes did this as a joke.