The Ten Weirdest Allegations From Paula Deen's Home-Cooked Racism and Sexual Harassment Complaint

A former employee of one of Paula Deen's restaurants has alleged that the Baroness of Butter and her brother Bubba Hiers have been cooking something besides candied vegetables and deep fried ham fat in their restaurant's kitchen: piping hot racism and from-scratch sexual harassment. Mmm. Just like Mom used to make. Deen claims that the allegations are false, but even if they're not true, they'd make one helluva screenplay. Here are the ten most bizarre.

10. "And now I'm going to do something I have never done — I am going to put a woman in a man's job."
Lisa Jackson was hired to work as a hostess and promoted to General Manager at Deen's Savannah, Georgia establishment known as Uncle Bubba's Seafood and Oyster House back in 2005. And that, she claims, is when the trouble started. She says she was promoted to replace a man who was fired for sleeping with the waitresses, and that Bubba was miffed at that, telling Jackson, "If you think I have worked this hard to lose everything because of a piece of pussy, you better think again."

9. "inescapable pornography"
Bubba loves his porn. So much so that it was constantly loaded up on the restaurant's computer.

8. "I bet your husband will like that"
When one female employee reported that she was going to start wearing dentures, Bubba remarked that her husband will like it. Because of gumjobs. Ew.

7. Racial tension.
Jackson, who is white, says that black employees were treated poorly. In one incident, Bubba violently shook a black cook who upset him. Not wanting to involve lawyers or authorities, Paula attempted to smooth things over by inviting him over to her mansion for dinner.

6. Why gay marriage should be legal.
During one weekly managers' meeting, Bubba passed around a printed out email forward with the subject line "Why gay marriage should be legal." Accompanying the subject line was a picture of two women having sex with each other.

5. "They should send President Obama to the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico so he could n******-rig it."
Bubba, with a helpful suggestion for how to fix the Gulf oil spill.

4. Kissing/Spitting
Jackson says that her employment under the racist iron fist of Bubba caused her to suffer from panic attacks, and that everything finally came to a head in 2010, when Bubba allegedly grabbed her face and declared he loved her, and then later screamed at and spit at her.

3. "What I would really like is a bunch of little n******s to wear long-sleeve white shirts, black shorts and black bow ties. You know in the Shirley Temple days, they used to tap dance around. Now, that would be a true Southern wedding wouldn't it?"
Lovely; more n-word. The Paula Deen of the lawsuit thinks the best way to cater a southern wedding is to hire decorative black people for authenticity.

2. Why is having sex with women with flat heads better?
Give up? It's so you can set a beer on top of their head while they give you a blow job! That antique joke restored, polished, and resold by Uncle Bubba, says Jackson.

1. Separate bathrooms for black and white employees.
According to the suit, white employees were free to use the customer bathroom at the front of the restaurant, but black employees had to use the facilities in the back.

Jackson is asking for unspecified damages.

While the allegations are pretty awful, take them with a grain of salt and a stick of butter. Perhaps Lisa Jackson is a disgruntled former employee trying to take revenge on her ex-boss. Or maybe something more sinister lurks in Paula Deen's gravy-submerged empire.