A pastor and his wife took to their bed to encourage people to "Bring God back to bed," but, according to didgeriwont, God doesn't want in on any of that kinky stuff:
Bedside note card found this morning:
"Dear Didgeriwont, so...thanx for inviting me into your bed again. I know it has been a while since I judged you and your self-love in pubescent years. Although it was great to reconnect again and I'm glad we can be friends again, you are in to some freaky-deaky. Like, I've been down for a little light kissing and massages building up to a little roughness, but you are whipping out all sorts of electrical gadgets, there was some harness type thing in the corner, and you made our safety word 'more'. I'm just an old fashioned deity and this stuff isn't for me. I appreciate the time we spent together, but I'm going to go back to not being in your bed for a while. Sincerely. God."
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