There were some simple, pretty dresses at the 17th Annual Critics' Choice Movie Awards, as well as some dramatic, with sequins and feathers. Alas, there were also a few boring, blah and meh ensembles.
Quite a few jewel tones on the red carpet last night. Emma Stone, resplendent in emerald, with romantic upswept hair, looked absolutely stunning. This dress, at first glance, is a little long and a little busy, but really, when your eyes focus and you give it a moment, it's a dream.
Bérénice Bejo — who is ridiculously charming in The Artist — wore the perfect sparkling sapphire cocktail dress. Maybe in my next life I can be an adorably gamine Argentinian/French actress with freckles?
Ruby red for Viola Davis and Busy Phillips, both of whom chose figure-skimming columns that are chic and sexy. Poor Missi Pyle! Such a fun actress, such a grody Peaches & Cream Barbie teen prom dress.
More messy/romantic hair, on Diane Kruger. Everything about this ensemble — from the gold bangles to the beautifully draped gown — says, "I'm a fucking goddess." You know what you're doing, Diane. Respect.
Elle Fanning's gauzy hippy dippy thing seems so inappropriate. It's a red carpet event, not a revival of Hair. Are those tresses crimped?! Elizabeth Olsen's canary yellow dress is short and punchy and age-appropriate, and also reminds me of my grandaddy's chenille bedspreads, which is a good thing.
Wendi McLendon-Covey has looked better. Maybe the camera flash has something to do with it, but that flag swag bunting stuff around her thighs — in a different fabric than the rest of the dress — was a poor decision on the part of some misguided designer. I'll take the sapphire necklace, though. Melissa McCarthy is like BAM. Looking beautiful. Upon first glance, Jessica Chastain's pink column looked a little baggy or shapeless, but in this shot, from the side, you can see the slit, which makes it great.
Bold shoulders! Mindy Kaling, Penelope Ann Miller and Diablo Cody all look fierce.
Ebony and ivory: Michelle Williams is predictably adorable; Tilda Swinton is divine and unique as always; Stacy Keibler and George Clooney are hot and sexy yet somehow safe and boring.
Charlize Theron's black textured gown is impeccable and glam, but what's truly gorgeous is her side-swept french-braided hair. So cool.
Also in black: Judy Greer, Ellie Kemper, Octavia Spencer. All very nice, figure-flattering, lady-like dresses.
Yes, yes, Maya Rudolph looks nicely put together, but my GOD. Cicely Tyson, 78 years old, exudes class and sass. The lace! The feathers! The rose! The hat! Applause.
Evan Rachel Wood's black lace number is flawless; her jewelry is fierce and I would kill or die for those shoes. But the hair is so I-love-the-'90s-Letters-To-Cleo-Bjork-on-a-flatbed-truck, which is not bad in and of itself, but doesn't suit the femme fatale ensemble.
Carrie Keegan has descended from her lair, having destroyed a few birds of prey on the way down the mountain. Linda Perry is awesome in that she's all, yeah, what, it's a tux. Chloe Grace Moretz's dress is kind of meh. Why so drab?
Ahna O'Reilly was in The Help, but she also has the notable and distinguished accomplishment of being James Franco's ex-girlfriend. The neckline of this kicky little frock is a bit odd, but I love the fun mix of yellow petticoat, grape suede heels and dark nail polish. Speaking of nails: Isabelle Fuhrman played Esther in Orphan — creepy! — and will play Clove in The Hunger Games — cool! Digging her feathery strapless number punctuated with neon nails — she's 14, after all.
I never watched Shailene Woodley on The Secret Life Of The American Teenager, but she was pretty amazing in The Descendants. And even though sometimes minimalism leads to snoozeville, this is a stunning dress, sexy in its simplicity.
Asa Butterfield, aka Hugo Cabret in Hugo, is a little heartthrob-in-the-making, dashing and dapper in a Sixties-esque skinny tux. If Nickelodeon does some kind of Mad Men Jr. I nominate him to star.
More dapper dudes to fall in love with: Paul Feig, Rob Huebel, Bret McKenzie from Flight of The Conchords.
Kiki Dunst's dour dress is a pretty witchy goth glam that goes great with her sour expression. Is Helen Morris wearing an opera coat? Because that is badass. Although she and Marty Scorsese look like they'd like to sit down. Brad Pitt should keep the cane even after his knee heals. And maybe add a hat and some breeches. He would make a great dandy. First, though: A fucking haircut.
Images via Getty.