While the holidays are a season of love and joy and giving and the such, they also entail a routine of obligation and decorum. And no matter how carefully you screen your calls and Facebook friend requests throughout the year, chances are at some point, you'll be stuck buying for someone who sucks. And here's how you do it.

It's a dick move to buy a hatepresent that's deliberately terrible, so the art of telling someone "Fuck you, and have a happy new year" is a delicate one. But here we are and here you are, brought together by faith and the spirit of gently dropping a truth bomb.