Today's Good Morning America featured a segment about all the ways your kid could meet their fateful end this coming holiday, by setting fire to a series of children's Halloween costumes, wigs, and accessories. Spooky! See, your kid's costume is almost definitely going up in flames if the child is within 20 feet of a candle. Oh, and your kid will also get hit by a car, as children are twice as likely to be struck by a moving car on Halloween than any other night of the year. (Gee, wonder why?) Moreover, the "remedies" — fake candles and light reflectors — didn't leave me feeling all that convinced that there was anything a parent could do to save their kid from near-certain death. Happy Halloween!