Norway Terrorist Deeply Upset by Sluts

While Norway reels from a terror attack that left more than 90 people dead, news media scrambles to comprehend why something like this could happen in a peaceful and politically stable Scandinavian democracy.

One Finnish journalist thinks he knows why Anders Behring Breivik blew up a government building and opened fire on a youth camp: it's because all terrorists need to get laid. Markus Määttänen argues, in his eye-rollingly dumb and tone deaf op-ed, (translated from Finnish)

If [Breivik] had gotten a little sex, and even someone to be a girlfriend of (his), they would never turn out massacres in the first place. Sex and the lack of it is central force to keep young men going. If young men miss the sexual activity, the mind starts to fill with these obsession of growing suffering of own awful existence to wider scale on surrounding society.

Ah, yes. The unfortunately common viewpoint- that if only women would sleep with them, terrorists wouldn't blow people and things up (oh, women, put aside your needs and desires and think about the people and things!). But before you all prepare to turn your vaginas into an unstoppable kamikaze fleet against terror and take one for the team by dating a dude who you think might one day make a car bomb, the meandering 1500 page manifesto purported to be written by the Norwegian terror suspect himself disproves that theory. It wasn't too little sex that was causing him grief; it was a breakdown of sexual morals resulting in everyone having too much sex.

Alleged attacker Anders Behring Breivik writes,

Approximately 50% of my female friends end up under the definition/category; promiscuous (female sluts) as they have engaged in sexual activity with more than 20 partners.

A majority of them have been infected with one or more sexually transmitted diseases – so called STDs such as herpes, chlamydia etc. A promiscuous lifestyle is glorified by the media through series such as Sex and the City and artists such as Madonna, Lady Gaga, Christina Aguilera and a multitude of other much nastier artists. The boundaries are gradually deteriorating as this development is allowed to continue."

Twenty partners? Perish the thought.

He laments the spread of STD's among his female relatives, including his sister (who has had sex with approximately 15 Chippendales strippers, according to the oddly specific manifesto) and mother. Freud would have a field day with this guy.

His slutty male friends also caused him a great deal of grief.

Although I have had a change of mentality a majority of my friends have not. My stepfather Tore, one of my best friends Marius and my more distant friends Kristoffer, Sturla and Ronny are all living manifestations of the complete breakdown of sexual moral. All five have had more than 300 sexual partners (two of them more than 700) and I know for a fact that three of them have one or more STDs (probably all of them). I have several other promiscuous (slut) friends and I could list at least 30 male and females in my social environment if I wanted to. I don't blame them personally and it has absolutely nothing to do with envy. I could easily have chosen the same path if I wanted to, due to my looks, status, resourcefulness and charm.

Breivik believes that part of the moral breakdown of recent years can be blamed on women gaining too much power.

Females have a significantly higher proportion of erotic capital than males due to biological differences (men have significantly more prevalent sexual urges than females and are thus easily manipulated). The female manipulation of males has been institutionalised during the last decades and is a partial cause of the feminisation of men in Europe. This highly underestimated factor has contributed to the creation and rise of the matriarchal systems which are now dominating Western European countries. European women, in light of the feminist revolution, are now considerably more influential than men due to the sum of all forms of capital.

As such, he yearns for a return to the morals of the 1950's, outlawing of birth control and abortion in an attempt to increase the white birth rate. Men should be the heads of the household, because, in Breivik's view, they are the best at making decisions (unless they are having too much or too little sex, or some lady is using her lady-powers to manipulate them into doing otherwise, or if people are being distractingly promiscuous in general).

Women are too powerful, everyone's too slutty, let's go back to the 1950's and take away the birth control and abortions and kick the Muslims out. Reading the Norway terrorist's manifesto is like being inside a Young Republicans meeting!

Clearly, Anders Behring Breivik is a special brand of unhinged and his manifesto reads like the autobiography of a Scandinavian Dwight Schrute. However, just like Jared Lee Loughner, George Sodini, and Scott Roeder, unhinged men with guns sure like to glom onto anti-female sentiment to justify their actions.

2083: A European Declaration of Independence (pdf)
Sexual Needs of Women Make Young Men Sick [Aamulehti] (additional translation)