Man Attacks Woman With A Swim Noodle

The nation is experiencing a huge surge in swim noodle-related arrests, as there has now been one. Karl Ludwig Eichner is accused of filling a noodle with sea water, then emptying it on a woman sitting on a Florida beach and punching her in the face. Here's how the fight got started, according to the police report:

A woman who was at the beach with a friend observed a rotting watermelon that had been carved and shaped into a head sitting on the sand. The watermelon seemed to have been abandoned so she placed it in the ocean in hopes that it would disintegrate and not attract any bugs.

Eichner retrieved the watermelon from the ocean and placed it back on the beach.

The woman placed the watermelon in the ocean once again.

Ah, it all makes sense now. For a minute we were worried this story would have no logical explanation.

Image via Pashin Georgiy/Shutterstock.