Who is Harald Glöckler? Well, he's a German fashion designer with a line — POMPÖÖS — for QVC in the U.K. And he is amazing. But no, really, who is Harald Glöckler?

Allow him to explain: "I'm very eccentric. I'm the most glamourous, most eccentric German fashion designer. When I was being a child, yes, I've been expired by my mother, my aunt. I've been inspired by Marlene Dietrich." But what's your house like, Harald? "I am a renaissance prince. My house, it's like a monarchy, I live like a prince." Are you a nice person? "I am very nice, very correct, very handsome and very down-to-earth." Harald, what is your creative process like? "Sometimes I sleep and I wake up in the morning and I have dreamed some dresses for women. Fantastic. The work is already done."

Harald Glöckler, you should know, is always himself. Harald Glöckler is beyond parody. Harald Glöckler is like a fashion-designer robot, built by aliens who understood the fashion industry and its preference for inexplicable facial hair but didn't quite get around to giving him a vocabulary beyond "People say I am a fashion prince" and "I am my favorite designer" and "I create things for the dogs, too, yes." Harald Glöckler is my new favorite person.