In less than two week's time, Oprah Winfrey's afternoon talk show will go dark forever. Does that statement make you start to feel a little panicky? Or maybe you already know there are only 10 episodes left because you've been counting the days?

If you said "yes" to either of these questions, you just may have what doctors are calling "Empty Oprah Syndrome." And by that, we simply mean that the people at Good Morning America found a psychiatrist willing to diagnose our grieving population. How kind of them.

It's hard for me not to roll my eyes at Oprah's "retirement." After all, she's leaving to focus on her whole fucking television network bearing her name. Don't get the OWN network in your local cable package? Look no further than the newsstands, where her magazine will still be sold. Not to mention that she's rumored to be invading New York City soon to fulfill her desire to star on a Broadway show. See, people! She's not really going anywhere at all! Why the grief, you weird grieving people?

THAT SAID: 25 years on the air is nothing to laugh at. The quarter-century for which her show has aired is impressive in and of itself, but her obsessively-obsessed fanbase she's accrued over the years says something about the impact Lady O has had on women nationwide. There's no doubt that Oprah has inspired many — including the women interviewed above — but are these feelings of sadness and loss real, or some kind of weird book club Stockholm Syndrome?