Bristol Palin's New Face Was Totes A Medical Necessity

You guys: Bristol Palin did not have plastic surgery. Nope. Not at all. What she had was "corrective" jaw surgery. If you think she looks better now, it's just a coincidence! "Yes, it improved the way I look, but this surgery was necessary for medical reasons," Bristol tells Us magazine. She explains that she had the procedure so that her jaw and teeth would align properly. Growing up, she had braces, but the dentist warned her that she might need surgery someday. We always thought that this kind of surgery required having your jaw broken, reset and wired shut — a process that could take a year or so — not an in-and-out thing, like, say, a chin implant. But Bristol will have us know that she is not the kind of girl who would have a purely cosmetic procedure: "I wouldn't get plastic surgery unless I got in an accident or something terrible and got disfigured." Aren't you glad that is cleared up? Phew. [AP]

Bristol Palin's New Face Was Totes A Medical Necessity

Arnold Schwarzenegger on his split from Maria Shriver: "We both love each other very much… We're very fortunate to have four extraordinary children. And we're taking it one day at a time. The bottom line is we want to thank all the people for their great, great support." Hey, does anyone else remember the time Premiere magazine published a story that included an anecdote about Ahnuld fooling around with some woman on the set of a movie? "He looked up and, with that accent, said very slowly, 'Eating is not cheating.'" [People]

This report claims that Arnold wants Maria back. [TMZ]

Bristol Palin's New Face Was Totes A Medical Necessity

Sarah Ferguson taped Oprah's show yesterday, and talked about how it hurt to miss the royal wedding. "I was not invited," the Duchess of York said. "I went through the phase of feeling so totally worthless and that it was quite right they didn't invite me. Why would they — why would they invite me?" The day of the ceremony, instead of helping her daughters Beatrice and Eugenie get dressed, Fergie chose to go to Thailand. "The jungle embraced me," she says. [Daily Mail]

The Duchess also says: "It was so hard because the last bride up that aisle was me." And: "I really love the feeling that sort of [Princess] Diana and I both weren't there." Say what now? [Page Six]

BTW: Oprah will sit down with James Frey for the first time since 2006, when she publicly scolded him for embellishing stories in A Million Little Pieces. [Pop Eater]

Bristol Palin's New Face Was Totes A Medical Necessity

Re: Jewelry theft, instead of going to jail, Lindsay Lohan will probably just be grounded. [ONTD]

  • Lady Gaga performed for bankers and "playfully" flipped them off. [Page Six]
  • Is Michael Fassbender — who plays Magneto in X-Men First Class — the dude who helped January Jones concoct a fetus? [ICYDK]
  • Rachel Weisz is in talks to be the leading lady in The Bourne Legacy, starring alongside Jeremy "Heart Locker" Renner. [Deadline Hollywood]
  • Woody Harrelson has indeed been cast as Haymitch in The Hunger Games. [The Hollywood Reporter]
  • I thought this read "Justin Bieber Joins The Hunger Games" and I sputter-choked. [E!]
  • Uh-oh. Drama on the set of Single Ladies! Stacey Dash vs. LisaRaye! Screaming and cursing in cocktail dresses and Louboutins! Man I wish they'd air footage from behind the scenes. [Us Magazine]
  • Paula Abdul fans are angry about Cheryl Cole joining the cast of X Factor and sitting between Paula and Simon. One Tweeted: "I resent the heck out of Cheryl 4 screwing up the reunion of the century! Why?" Another added: "Paula is our sweet little angel! Why is Simon letting that big-haired girl take her seat?" [Digital Spy]
  • Whoa: One of the guys trying to win the heart of the lady on the new season of The Bachelorette is a widower — his wife drowned in their bathtub shortly after they argued. The death is "mysterious" and "bizarre" and the Bachelorette is being warned to watch out for the dude. Where do they find these people? [Radar Online]
  • "Radio Host to Hilary Swank: You're Not a 'Pretty Girl.'" [TMZ]
  • First world problems: Kristin Cavallari is deciding between a "really small, intimate wedding or a huge, blowout party-type wedding." [People]
  • Unsolicited Uterus Update: Donatella Arpaia — restauranteur and Iron Chef America judge — is pregnant. [Page Six]
  • The Cannes Film Festival has begun, and Woody Allen's latest romantic comedy, Midnight in Paris, opened the 11-day event. [AFP]
  • No woman, no cry: 30 years ago today, Bob Marley died. [The Life Files]
  • "We took some dirty Jill Clayburgh jokes out because I just thought, 'That can't be the last thing she ever says in a film.' We did debate it. We were like, 'That's funny, but that would be questionable.' She was the nicest woman. We're all so influenced by her work and her acting style. We really appreciate that real, naturalistic acting style. She was just a great woman. None of us knew she was sick. She was just awesome, every day." — Judd Apatow on Bridesmaids. [Contact Music]
  • "I don't normally spill things down myself but every single drink went down that dress. Then they had a curry buffet at this wedding and the curry went all the way down the dress as well, and then I went to the toilet and I got it stuck in the door and it ripped it all the way down the back. So I was the worst bridesmaid in the entire world." — Keira Knightley. [Contact Music]
  • "You're full of shit. I'm telling you you're full of shit. I know you. I stood up for you. I put my fucking balls on the line for you a hundred fucking times. I ask you one fucking favor and you tell me to go fucking be like a regular fucking Joe Blow and go on welfare? No, my friend, I don't do that." — The Situation's dad is a wee bit upset that the Sitch isn't giving him money. [The Superficial]