The anniversary of Roe v. Wade is a perfect opportunity for National Organization of Marriage's chief bigot, Maggie Gallagher, to talk about how gross she thinks anal sex is. "This should be a feminist issue," she writes. Come again?
Gallagher's biggest gift to the world may be the camp-tastic anti-gay marriage "Gathering Storm" ad; she also took tens of thousands of dollars from the Bush administration to promote "healthy marriage" without disclosing it to readers of her syndicated column. (She claimed she simply forgot.) She has made the fight against gay marriage a central part of her life's work.
Her most recent offering is ingenious in its ability to careen from Roe v. Wade to anal sex. Now watch this drive: "Roe v. Wade symbolizes a sexual culture that teaches young women: To succeed you have to deform your body to be like a man, to do what men like. Or else you've failed and it's your fault." That's because "women's bodies are designed for connection, to connect sex, love, and yes, even babies."
What is the greatest example of the perversion of this connection? Anal. Gallagher points to data on women trying anal sex. "When asked if they enjoy it "very much," just 15 percent of women who've tried it say yes. So why do women do it?" Because Obama celebrates the killing of babies, of course.
Anal sex is painful, unsanitary, unsatisfying for women, and creates unique risks for serious physical diseases (if you doubt me, go read the Wikipedia entry on the subject) because the anus is not designed for sexual intercourse, increasing the risk of torn flesh and the intermingling of bodily fluids — blood, semen, fecal matter — that can spread an astonishing variety of diseases. The female partner is far more at risk than the man in these encounters. This should be a feminist issue.
The central committee for the declaration of the feminist agenda welcomes Ms. Gallagher's submission. It's true that some women don't like anal sex; others do, very much. One could very well be concerned about some aspects of the mainstreaming of the act — such as teenagers educated under abstinence-only programs mistakenly believing it doesn't count as sex and possibly that it won't give them an STD.