Khloe Kardashian Says TSA Is "Basically Raping You"

Oh yes, she did: On Lopez Tonight, Khloe Kardashian proved beyond question that she doesn't know what the word "rape" means.

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  • Quoth she, "Well, they basically just are raping you in public. I got asked the other day, do you want to go for a screening or get padded down, I don't want that X-Ray to see everything, honey. The people are so aggressive! It's like, 'Chill out, you didn't find anything on me yet, calm down.' They say, 'OK, I'm going to be pat you down and I'm going to be touching the crease of your ass.' That is so inappropriate to me! And they are so aggressive and forceful." No, honey, they basically aren't doing anything of the kind. [DListed]
  • Meanwhile. Kim Kardashian and Gabriel Aubry: off. Kim Kardashian and NY Jet Kris Humphries: on. I know, it's hard to keep up. You can remember because he has the same name as her mom. [Huffington Post]
  • We knew Jersey Shore roomie Angelina Pivarnick had been kicked out of an Atlantic City nightclub for brawling. And now we know more! Like that she was the antagonist! It's her word against the cops. We don't know what theirs is, but this is hers. "That night I feel I was provoked, taunted, and harassed into a fight. On top of that there are signs pointing in the direction that this was a set up against me and I have witnesses and evidence to prove this." Top those, AC police! [TMZ]
  • Chelsea Handler is defiant about calling Angelina Jolie a homewrecking see-you-next-Tuesday. Handler, who recently vacationed with Jennifer Aniston, says she wasn't being mean about Angelina out of loyalty, she's always done it! "I've been making fun of Angelina Jolie since she made out with her brother," she explains. [People]
  • Blake Lively, who as we all know does not work with a stylist, will now be the face of a Chanel campaign. [E]
  • Although they've been spotted together, apparently Cameron Diaz and A-Rod aren't back on. Or they are, and he's just hanging out with Kelly Bensimon while Cameron's in Europe. [PopSugar]
  • Asked how she is since her divorce, Neve Campbell replied, "I'm always doing great." Some bloggers found this deeply reassuring and convincing. [Pink is the New Blog]
  • "Did Jon Hamm Finally Propose to His Girlfriend of 13 Years?" No. Says the square-jawed swoonmeister, "I don't have the marriage chip...Jen is the love of my life, and we've already been together four times longer than my parents were married." [US]
  • TI writes from prison that he's becoming a better man. He also says, "How do you tell God Almighty that all you wanna do is LIVE LIFE ??? What if all you wanna do is be a father to your kids, a husband to your wife, and son to your mother." [TMZ]
  • There is no reason to think that Marion Cotillard is pregnant. [LaineyGossip]
  • That fake balloon kid is starting a band. He's 7. [Perez Hilton]
  • Johnny Depp is team Brangelina. "They're very, very good parents. Great parents. Wonderful people. Down-to-earth. Sweet." [E]
  • Also at the Tourist premiere, apparently Brad groped Angie's ass. [E]
  • Margaret Cho is sick of people ragging on Bristol Palin's body. Says she, "I just wanted to say that I was upset because people were criticizing her because of her body, because I felt that before and I hated that when it happened to me. So, I wanted to say, ‘She's not fat she's a beautiful girl!...I like her, I'm a supporter of Bristol. I'm not a supporter of their family's politics, but I think she's a cool person." That's how it's done. [Access Hollywood]
  • Christina Aguilera and her new bf have, apparently, already "shacked up." [E]