Before last night's premiere of Bret Michael's family-based reality show, VH1 an update on the lives of his varied paramours from three seasons of Rock of Love. Where are they now? Well, for the most part, in strip clubs.
While Daisy is focusing on an acting career, Lacey is focusing on rescuing dogs, Destiney is focusing on being a single mother and modeling for Hustler, Rodeo is focusing on charity work, involving horses and Ferraris. It's unclear if "charity" means that she's doing benevolent acts or just doing commercials for free. When asked, in an interview on VH1's blog, what she thinks of Bret's new show, Life as I Know It, she said:
People that thought he was just a regular rocker and didn't really have any beliefs, I think he's made them turn around. Also, it made them listen to rock more, I do believe. He's shown people how life goes on. I love him to pieces and I'm grateful that I know him. I'm grateful that I'm the first one he chose, and I think there's a reason: 'cause I inspire people. That's why I'm on the Where Are They Now special. I'm hoping it can make a difference in everybody.
Heather is living in Vegas and still hasn't gotten that "Bret" tattoo removed.
On the special she was shown shooting a 2011 calendar, but mainly she's making a living by stripping:
The irony is that while Bret is bitching about baby seats in Bentleys on his show and flying in his private jet wearing his new Italian hair, for everyone else, it's back to the pole. It's back to the struggle and the grind, no pun intended.
Meanwhile, Farrah and Ashley—known on Rock of Love Bus as the charter members of "The Blondetourage"—are stripping together, as a team. They were sad to learn that Bret had a "hemorrhoid" in his brain.
As for what they think of Bret's new show, Ashley said:
What's entertaining to me is seeing a bunch of drunk strippers falling down on their faces and heating up Hot Pockets. America likes trash and I don't see what's trashy about his family life. Also, I have a hard time buying Bret Michaels as a family man. He's a skank just like me.
While Farrah's take is pithier:
You can't make a whore into a househusband.
Brandi C. is living in Florida and her boyfriend—whose friends urged him to Google Brandi before beginning a courtship, a request he denied—proposed to her on the special.
Her take on Bret's new image as a family man:
I'm sure his children are less embarrassed.
And then there's Angelique, aka "Frenchie." She drives a pink convertible, says she's addicted to stripping and shopping, and fondly refers to her mouth as DSL (dick-sucking lips).
Tamra was the girl who was so wasted all the time that she walked out of the wrong exit on two different reality shows (Rock of Love and I Love Money). She's still unsteady on her feet, but lives in a gorgeous home (with her parents).
Also living in a gorgeous home is Megan, who has finally achieved her dream of becoming a trophy wife. No mention was made of the fact that she had her own show, Megan Wants a Millionaire, most likely because VH1 yanked it off the air after three episodes and has pretended as though it never happened when one of its contestants, Ryan Jenkins, murdered his wife and later killed himself. Megan seems OK about it all though.
Never one to mince words, Megan has perhaps the most realistic take on Bret's new show:
If he really has had a revelation and wants to be a family man now, then I'm really happy for him. I do think he should solidify it by marrying the girl and proving that he's serious. It would be one more step in the right direction about being honest about his real life. The only thing left to do would be to stop wearing a wig and bandanna.