A new and scary alternative to breast implants is the Breform: a mesh "bra" that goes under your skin.
The Daily Mail calls Breform "a soft sponge mesh which is placed under the skin and acts in the same way as a bra." Because why bother with bra-shopping when you can have one inserted into your living tissues, amirite ladies? Says breast surgeon Fiona Court,
What happens is over time with gravity and the pressures on the breast tissue the skin stretches and you get recurrent drooping. The Breform supports the breast tissue into its new position - this also reduces the scarring.
Claire Coleman, the fifth person in the UK to get the Breform (why aren't more women queuing up to have coffee filters injected into their tits?), says that after her surgery, "There are thick lines going from the nipples down. But I know they too will fade in time." Also, she can't feel the mesh at all — small blessings, I guess. Court points out that the Breform could aid in breast reconstruction for cancer survivors, and it could be good for women who have undergone surgery or radiation to have more options. At the same time, Breform really might want to deemphasize the "bra" angle — there's just something horrifying about underwear that goes under you.
Image via Daily Mail