Fantasia Barrino nearly killed herself because of allegations that she broke up a marriage. Will this be enough to put the "homewrecker" myth to rest?
Nekesa Mumbi Moody of the AP writes that when divorce papers filed by the wife of Antwaun Cook blamed Barrino as the cause of the split, "she was so upset about allegations that she broke up a marriage she was ready to die." Barrino was "so devastated and upset about lies being spread about her that she couldn't function anymore," she took a mixture of aspirin and sleeping pills in an effort to end her life. She now says the allegations were false — she claims Cook was already separated when they got together, and "I don't think I would stand for going in and breaking up somebody's home." But does this even matter?
The AP uses the h-word right in its headline, proclaiming, "Fantasia denies allegations she is a homewrecker." But even if she had dated Cook while he was living with his wife, the real homewrecker would've been him. He was the one who had made a promise to his spouse, and he was the only one who could break it. When are we going to stop shaming women who supposedly break up marriages, when breaking up is something only the two people in the marriage have the power to do?
Sure, sleeping with a married man isn't the most moral thing. But said man has to make his own moral choices, and it's time to stop treating him like a dumb animal dragged around by different women. In fact, men can control their urges, and women can only "lure" them away from their wives if they consent to be lured. Barrino's now in therapy, and says "the best way for me to clear my name is through my show" — Fantasia for Real, which starts in September. But she doesn't need to "clear her name" — and now that it almost caused a woman's death, it's time for us to wake up and realize the term "homewrecker" is bullshit.