The best thing about Johnny Weir? Not his skating, his artfully coiffed hair, or his unabashed love of Chanel. It's his ability to create instant soundbites. Weir has a gift for spouting insane, enjoyable, marvelous proclamations.
The skater — who's about to drop a dance track and whose style involves lots of fur and Japanese flag pedicures — is profiled in the new issue of New York, where he quips, "In spite of all the skills that I do have, to relate to the normal world I have no applicable skills." But it's obvious: This guy, who shouts "COCAINE" when he wants a snippet of conversation to be off the record, is a gifted communicator.
Some recent bon mots:
"[For my performance] they kind of sat back and had their cognac and cigarettes and they were relaxing and watching, and [my competitor's] was more like a vodka shot, let's-snort-coke kind of thing."
"His name is Camille - two 'l's. I think he's my evil side. When I skate badly, I blame it on my glove."
"[Use] blot powder or concealer. I don't consider looking like a shiny mess manly. Men need to understand the importance of their skin and beauty regime; there's nothing not-masculine about taking care of yourself. The face you present to the world is the most important one."
"I could very well wake up and feel horrible, like Nick Nolte's mug shot."
"This heat makes me think about skating topless. Nipple tassles."
I love anything Chanel really. It could be a bag to a moist towelette and I'd love it. CC Forever.
"Technology frightens me so much. Whatever happened to the pony express?"
"I always, always, always have a bag. And it's a purse. I'm not even going to try to hide it. I carry purses. In general, they're Balenciaga."
From New York:
"There's a whole new generation of people who aren't defined by their sex or race or who they like to sleep with."
"I don't need anyone for anything. I can have sex with myself, I can love myself, I can do all those things myself. The importance that people place on me not having another half even if it's just for sex, it's irrelevant to me. It's very old-school. When you put people in boxes, you take away a lot of who that person is. How many gay men do we know who are completely straight-acting, who don't even seem gay but they get classified in the same box as somebody who's a drag queen? It's void. It's not real. I filled out my census form and I wrote down that I was a Pacific Islander because yes, I'm white, but why is that important? Why is anything important? You don't need to have labels. I would marry a woman. I very well could. People laugh at me, but why is that so funny? I love women. My whole stance is that I just want people to react to who I am, I don't want people to react to what I am."
"The reason I haven't told the nitty-gritty and the dirty past and what I chose to be involved with sexually is because, first of all, it's trashy. It's not cute."
The Johnny Weir Spectacular [New York]
[Image by Cass Bird via New York.]