Life & Style
WHY SANDRA IS TAKING JESSE BACK
This article presents no actual evidence that Sandra Bullock and Jesse James have reunited. However, "Her heart is open to him again," according to an "insider" — probably Sandy's liver. In other poorly-reported news, the "exclusive" on Alicia Keys' upcoming wedding is a two paragraph story in which a source claims they'll get married in Europe this summer with Jay-Z and Beyonce in attendance. Life & Style confirms what we already know: Jennifer Aniston is not, repeat not, dating Chris Gartin. "They had dinner once but haven't really spoken since then. It was one and done." It's costing taxpayers 16,000 a month to lock Lindsay Lohan away for three months, but she stands to make more than $500,000 on her stint in jail. In addition to interviews she'll do during and after her incarceration, she spent her last few hours of freedom Tweeting product endorsements for $2,500 to $3,000 a pop and showing up to stores to get paid for posing with various products. Next: Mel Gibson's wife Robyn claims he never abused her, but a source says she's just trying to get more money from their divorce settlement in exchange for her silence. "What she put up with for the last 10 years was often sheer hell. He'd go on alcohol-fueled rages, and she'd be terrified — not only for her own life but for the lives of her children." The source adds that Robyn blames Mel for getting "at least two" of their kids addicted to drugs. Moving on: The mag reports that when Jake Pavelka said, "Please stop interrupting me," on the Bachelor reunion, "the brute force of the words sent Vienna racing through the studio doors in a flood of tears that probably washed away Jake's long-held dreams of stardom too." Lastly, RHONY's Bethenny Frankel says she hasn't decided if she wants to have a second child, but she better decide fast; The mag notes she's 39 and, "her biological clock continues to tick" ... even though she just gave birth three months ago.

Grade: D- (A poor player that struts and frets his hour upon The Bachelor, then is heard from no more. )