Today in Midweek Madness, celebs feel the sting of having an ungrateful child: Tom Cruise's daughter hates him, Mel Gibson turned his kids into drug addicts, and Sarah Palin isn't speaking to Bristol... because Alaskans don't own cell phones.
HOW I LOST 10 LBS FAST!
Imagine you're at a party and run into an acquaintance whose name you can't quite remember. For the next 45 minutes, she prattles on about how yoga has changed her life and encourages you to try these new protein shakes she's "addicted" to. Now you know what it's like to read a six-page cover story about the Bachelorette getting even thinner. Let's excuse ourselves to check in with our old friend Lindsay Lohan. Sources say that during her brief stay at Robert Shapiro's sober living facility, Linds "experienced grueling withdrawal from prescription drugs." She felt sick and "got very dizzy and could barely stand," but now it's "No more Adderall, no more Vicodin, no more stuff like that. Only a low, low dosage of antidepressants — which she legitimately needs to function — and a low-level anxiety pill that will help her cope." Next: Inspired by Kristen Stewart playing a stripper in Welcome to the Rileys, an OK! scribe has composed some Twilight erotica: "She admits to friends she feels super sexy when she gyrates to the music and struts around," claims a source. "Rob already thought Kris was the sexiest woman in the world, but the first time she offered him a lap dance, he couldn't believe his luck." In other news, Kendra Wilkinson's baby is now seven months old and growing less marketable by the day, so she's started selling the tabloids stories about her currently non-existent second kid. She hopes to get pregnant at some point in the next year and will name the baby Jaden. Finally, can you match these stars to their mostly-hideous tattoos? (Image 7)