Welcome back to Midweek Madness, in which we get cozy with In Touch, Ok!, Life & Style, Us and Star. This week: Lindsay's suicidal, Bristol's engaged, Aniston's a mom and Kim's hot.
"Jen's A Mom!"
Courtney Cox throws these elaborate kids' parties, and she had one for her friend Chris Gartin — whom Jennifer Aniston is rumored to be dating. Jen was painting a teapot with the kids and "insiders" were all, "she's so comfortable!" Apparently Jen has always been good with kids, and she has been calling Chris's kids on the phone and buying them presents. Which, according to this mag, makes her a mom. Also, the answer to the question "Is Chris is the new Brad?" (see image 7) is: No. Moving on: Page 48 predicts that Penelope Cruz will get married later this summer in Spain — guess the editors didn't know she already got hitched in the Bahamas earlier this month. Lastly: Danielle Staub reveals what she ate today: Breakfast was a bagel. For a snack, she had almonds and a venti white chocolate peppermint mocha. For lunch, she had a grilled chicken wrap. For dinner? A grilled chicken salad with snow peas and mandarin oranges.
Grade: F (secret kid)