A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Come with me, if you will, to Nashville's Bridgestone Arena. There, we'll see Taylor and Faith, LeAnn and Carrie, Sheryl and Kellie...and, of course, Snooki and the Situation. We'll figure it out together, at the CMT Music Awards.

A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Taylor Swift, per usual, blends demure and sexy to cute effect. Is this raisin-hued damask the best of her looks? Not by a long shot, but she could still give most of her age group a master-class in the art of the red carpet.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Sheryl Crow rides the bridal train...straight into 1998.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Faith Hill opts for tie-dye; Tim, the douche-neck. Have I mentioned my prognostication that the American Apparel "Le New Big Tee" will be the douche-neck 2010? You saw it here first.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Why is Hayden Panettiere here? No idea. Why did she let Scarlett O'Hara make her dress? Questions, questions.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Good: risks. Bad: this Barbie-goes-to-the-CFDAs. Still, good on Carrie Underwood for trying.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

If I'm not mistaken, LeAnn Rimes is in Mara Hoffman. Not my thing, but still digging on the coherence and the confidence!


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Laura Bell Bundy is either doing something admirably inventive with a scarf, or is wearing a rather unfortunate dress.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Here's what I can say for Kellie Pickler: she's ready for the court of Louis XIV.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Perhaps Kimberly Roads Schlapman (with Karen Fairchild) of Little Big Town wanted to do an homage to the big-haired Nashville of yore. And the electric fences of Tom Ford's all-black ranch.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

We've all done the old "wait-that's-tonight?-better-throw-on-my-embroidered-coat" thing. We stand with Elizabeth Cook.


A Little Bit Country, A Lot Mystifying At CMT AwardsS

Wait, Snookie and the Situation are here? Um, obvi. Like Santa Claus, they have the ability to be in front of hundreds of cameras in hundreds of locations in the same night. Unlike Santa Claus, this does not cause delight and wonder.

[Images via Getty.]