Welcome back to Midweek Madness, in which Margaret and I nibble hot, delicious gossip served up by In Touch, Star, Us, Ok! and Life & Style. This week: The Housewives are feuding; Sandy's adopting and Heidi and Spencer are faking.
"Wedding & Baby For Kim!"
Even though we have seen paparazzi pix of Reggie Bush out shopping with his new girlfriend, this cover claims "All of Kim's dreams are finally coming true." Apparently Kris Jenner called Reggie and "in a moving plea," asked him to spend more time with Kim. Kim's nephew Mason makes her want to have a baby and Khloe's wedding makes her want to have a wedding. So dumb, and we're not buying it. Moving on: Angelina Jolie's birthday on Friday will be "low-key." Brad plans on getting her a massage. Shiloh's recent party had an international pirate theme — kids dressed in costumes as pirates from different countries for the "It's A Small World" vibe. Who got to be the Somali pirate? Next: Jennifer Aniston will be topless in a comedy flick called Horrible Bosses. Colin Farrell will also appear shirtless in the film, by the by. Next: One of the only interesting things in this mag is the mystery of Maureen McCormick's bathing suit. The caption claims that she is wearing the same suit she wore when she was on the Brady Bunch, but then, another caption claims the bikini is made by Shoshonna and available at Saks.com. WTF? (See image 7). Of note: Kim Kardashian is now Ok!'s contributing beauty editor. Not that she writes her own copy. And Bethenney Frankel has a column — and does seem to write her own copy! Lastly, here's what Jewel ate today: Breakfast was Greek yogurt blended with cottage cheese, berries and ginger. For lunch, she had grilled salmon sent from her family Alaska; snacks were almonds and string cheese, and for dinner she had a turkey burger with no bun and Brussels sprouts.
Grade: F (cold gravy)