It's a truth universally acknowledged that, because it's an event that encourages high-fashion risk-taking, the Met Costume Institute Ball results in some of the year's most spectacular Bads. And Worses. And we haven't even talked "Ugly" yet...

Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Some pundits are already raving over Wintour's Chanel. I think it looks like a window treatment. An ugly window-treatment.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

As to co-chair Oprah? I think her ruffly de la Renta is frumptastic.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

She was in good company: Mariska's blue is stunning, but the ruffles? Ravenous.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

That goes ditto for Abbie Cornish's Louis Vuitton.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

And can we talk about Jessica Szohr's Versace?



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Riley Keough, in Thakoon for Gap, is literally being consumed.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Did we mention Mary J's J. Mendel?



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Or, for that matter, Rosario Dawson's lingerie-on-top, gramma-bathroom-on-the-bottom Giambattista Valli?



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

I see where Maggie Gyllenhaal's going with this Louis Vuitton. I also see "valance."



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

The Vegas showgirl look, as represented by Ivanka Trump and Versace.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Oh, and Blake Lively's Marchesa.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

And I think Padma Lakshmi's Roberto Cavalli goes in this category.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

I asked my boyfriend what he thought of January Jones' YSL. He said, "well, maybe if the dress code was 'Gothic tracery'...?"



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Vera Farminga goes "milkmaid" in Sophie Theallet for Gap.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Going with the bizarre bridal trend, Kirsten Dunst does Rodarte for Gap - and her shoes are definitely making me blue.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Carey Mulligan in Miu Miu isn't awful, but it's dull and slightly too cas, yes? Whatever, she's still batting like .800.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Look, I like evening pants, I do. I'm not sure Alexa Chung's whimsical "little tramp" look qualifies as either. Good try, though.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

And Tina Fey: why do you make me put you in the Bad? Why?



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Sean Lennon and friends are always "wacky!" I'm speaking specifically here of Charlotte Kemp Muhl's mustard...costume.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

To reach high is to risk a bad fall. Example: Elizabeth Banks's Gucci ostrich costume.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

Renee Zellweger loves Carolina Herrera. This gown is ugly.



Met Costume Institute Ball Fashions: The (Very, Very) BadsS

The Kaiser's belt is veering towards "cowboy." Also, "parody."


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