We almost flipped a table when we learned the Jersey Housewives are returning to TV May 3. The second season promises more fights, fur, buh-bies, Juicy Joe, and nonsensical insults. We break down the trailer, after the jump.


OK, first of all?

I think that essentially sums up both what we can expect from this season, as well as my reaction to it.


Secondly, I'm loving "That's ah-fuckin'-nuff!"

It's practically more Italian than "That's amore!" I'm not sure that it'll replace "prostitution whore," but it'll certainly be much easier to work into actual conversations.

Also: "Don't call me 'honey.'"
"Is 'bitch' better?"

Danielle is ready for battle this season—literally.

She's taking boxing lessons and says, "It only takes one good smack to the head to make a person never walk again." Additionally, it appears that she's employing the Hell's Angels for security. Because, you know, that worked out so well at Altamont.

But as Dina says, Danielle is "fuckin' crazy."

Toward the end of the trailer, someone can be heard screaming, "There's somebody with a knife!" We can all see where this is headed.

To make up for the lack of warm, fuzzy feelings between these ladies, Teresa is dressing her babies in head-to-toe fur.