Animal Sex Is Wild • Mom Calls Cops On 6-Year-Old Daughter

• The weird, curly, gelatinous thing in the image at left is actually a duck penis. And, curiouser and curiouser, the female duck has a similarly corkscrew-shaped vagina - only it curves the opposite direction.

However, the coolness of their genitalia is brought down a notch when you find out why they are so oddly designed: the female duck's labyrinthine vagina is intended to help her escape potential rapists, and ensure that she is only impregnated by a suitor of her choosing. • Looking for the perfect gift for your multi-tasking boyfriend? Get him this two-in-one beard trimmer and cellphone! This is where I should make a joke about wanting a RAZR, but it's too easy. • Germany has refused, yet again, to return the bust of Nefertiti to Egypt. Officials claim the bust is too fragile to be moved. • A 54-year-old woman from Minnesota may be facing assault charges after she grabbed a man by his genitals hard enough to cause him to require stitches. She claims he cut himself, but he told police quite a different story. • A zoo in Illinois has raised over $20,000 by selling necklaces and ornaments made from reindeer poop. The droppings are dime-sized, dehydrated, sterilized, and covered in glitter. • Australian moms are paying up to $1000 a liter for black market breast milk. Lack of guidelines makes it difficult to regulate the breast milk trade, which has lead many mothers to pay exorbitant prices. Lactation experts are calling for national guidelines for the sale of breast milk, which would hopefully classify the liquid as a food product. • According to Myanmar news sources, the Burmese Supreme Court has agreed to hear pro-democracy leader Aung San Suu Kyi's appeal. The court had previously turned down several requests, but some hope that this may be a sign the junta is relaxing their grip on Suu Kyi, and may even allow her to go free in time for next year's promised elections. • 300 French high school students showed up for class wearing short skirts or Bermuda shorts as part of a protest against the recently tightened dress codes. Léa Dedieu, the 17-year-old who organized the protest, said she wanted to make a philosophical point about freedom, and it wasn't intended "to draw attention to ourselves." • Every year Cadbury makes a special batch of dark chocolate exclusively for the royal family. "We've been providing chocolates to the royal family since Victorian times, but I cannot discuss the recipe," revealed a spokesperson for the company. • An Ohio mom called the cops on her own 6-year-old daughter after she found out that she had shoplifted a $3.11 package of stickers. Police picked up the girl and took her down to the station, but she was not arrested. Diane Lyons said she wanted to teach her child an early lesson about right and wrong. "I don't think I went too far," she said. •