True/Slant "infiltrator" Harmon Leon visited a church on National Porn Sunday to mock worshipers and learn about how "Satan is pimpin' this generation."

National Porn Sunday is run by the oddly-named XXX Church, whose website states,

Porn Sunday seeks to drive the conversation about pornography into our churches, families and lives. This weekend service brings healing to those sitting in churches who are caught up in pornography.

For Leon, it brings easy targets. When a "large, highly repressed woman with glasses in matching tweed suit jacket and skirt" points him to her husband's "testimony" about losing interest in her due to porn, Leon reflects, "How surprising. Who would have thought that her husband would become sexually disinterested in this piece of work?" And here's how he says he chatted with "a large, smiley manly man:"

"Today's sermon was, how do I say it, powerful!" I exclaim. "I could tell you firsthand how porn has affected my life.

"Has it been something you've been struggling with," the manly man asks, making creepy eye-contact that shifts as I explain my faux porn addiction.

"Yes," I say, licking my dry lips, explaining that I was addicted to gay porn, most specifically photos of men in the outdoors doing very compromising things. His creepy eye-contact becomes stronger. I wave his brochure. "Yeah, I'll have to check out this Men's Prayer retreat. (Pause.) We'll be camping, right?"

Is that you, Bruno? But mock-the-Christians free-for-all aside, Porn Sunday does appear to have taught Leon some disturbing things about XXX Church's anti-porn crusade. In Dirty Little Secret (above), a video shown at the event, a guilty husband confesses, "If I have to be brutally honest, it's not just naked women I look at" — implying that looking at straight porn either leads you to homosexuality (horrors!) osr possibly, as Leon guesses, "Brazilian monkey porn." And the pastor "tells of an email he claims to have received from a 12-year-old girl who's struggling against porn. It was written while crying with alcohol and a bottle of sleeping pills in front of her, because Satan now gives her nightmares." This 12-year-old, if she exists, deserves to be told that her sexual desires are normal, not that "Satan is pimpin' this generation" and trying to make her "his ho" (apparently "hip-hop language" is another tool of XXX Church). I'm not sure that we needed an "infiltrator" to tell us that fundamentalist anti-porn programs are ignorant, sex-negative, and creepy. Still, maybe we should all watch a little porn this Sunday in protest — after all, Satan has to get his money somehow.

Porn Sunday, The XXX Church, And You! [True/Slant]